¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think is the reason why the number of COVID-19 cases there in Korea keeps on increasing?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-07-15 188

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think the number of COVID-19 cases in Korea keeps on increasing because of goverment's counterplan.
For instance, in Korea, the number of COVID-19 is increasing a lot, then they just make their COVID-19 level up.
Then people can't go outside freely with their friends or other people, so COVID-19's number goes down.
Then the goverment make their COVID-19 level down so people go outside with a lot of people.
So the number of COVID-19 is increasing a lot, so the goverment make the level up again.
So this is repeated a lot of time, and that's why Korea can't make down the number of COVID-19.
So I think it is better to keep COVID-19 level up, so if we do that, there will be no more COVID-19 patient.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! ^^

After experiencing a sharp growth in COVID-19 cases early in the pandemic, South Korea rapidly controlled transmission while implementing less stringent national social distancing measures. This has led to substantial interest in their ¡°test, trace, isolate¡± strategy. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.


I think the number of COVID-19 cases in Korea keeps on increasing because of goverment's counterplan.
>> I think the number of COVID-19 cases in Korea keeps on increasing because of the government's counterplan.

For instance, in Korea, the number of COVID-19 is increasing a lot, then they just make their COVID-19 level up.
>> For instance, even thought the cases are increasing, all they do is just increase the pandemic's level.

Then people can't go outside freely with their friends or other people, so COVID-19's number goes down.
>> Then people can't go outside freely with their friends or other people to decrease the number of confirmed cases. 

Then the goverment make their COVID-19 level down so people go outside with a lot of people.
>> Then eventually, they will lower down the level again. 

So the number of COVID-19 is increasing a lot, so the goverment make the level up again.
>> And then when it increases again, they will rise the level again. 

So this is repeated a lot of time, and that's why Korea can't make down the number of COVID-19.
>> This is repeated a lot of times that's why the cases don't go down. 

So I think it is better to keep COVID-19 level up, so if we do that, there will be no more COVID-19 patient.
>> So I think it is better to keep COVID-19 level up, so if we do that, there will be no more COVID-19 patients. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110115 Homework (309) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 203
110114 What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of cell phones? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 183
110113 Homework ¿ì*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 181
110112 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 1
110111 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 171
110110 Sorry plz make it skipped ¼Û*ö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 196
110109 I want to be like Wanda ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 194
110108 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 222
110107 Summer Vacation!! Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 169
110106 What is the worst problem you have ever faced in your life and... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 267
110105 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 168
110104 What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of cell phones? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 1
110103 Homework: Àü*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 2
110102 Have ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 179
110101 Homework: Àü*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 2
110100 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 183
110099 Homework: Àü*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 2
110098 Homework. ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 196
110097 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 4
110096 Is there any policy that you don\'t like in you part-time job?... ÀÌ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-16 231

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04