¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think is the reason why the number of COVID-19 cases there in Korea keeps on increasing?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-07-15 309

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think the number of COVID-19 cases in Korea keeps on increasing because of goverment's counterplan.
For instance, in Korea, the number of COVID-19 is increasing a lot, then they just make their COVID-19 level up.
Then people can't go outside freely with their friends or other people, so COVID-19's number goes down.
Then the goverment make their COVID-19 level down so people go outside with a lot of people.
So the number of COVID-19 is increasing a lot, so the goverment make the level up again.
So this is repeated a lot of time, and that's why Korea can't make down the number of COVID-19.
So I think it is better to keep COVID-19 level up, so if we do that, there will be no more COVID-19 patient.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! ^^

After experiencing a sharp growth in COVID-19 cases early in the pandemic, South Korea rapidly controlled transmission while implementing less stringent national social distancing measures. This has led to substantial interest in their ¡°test, trace, isolate¡± strategy. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.


I think the number of COVID-19 cases in Korea keeps on increasing because of goverment's counterplan.
>> I think the number of COVID-19 cases in Korea keeps on increasing because of the government's counterplan.

For instance, in Korea, the number of COVID-19 is increasing a lot, then they just make their COVID-19 level up.
>> For instance, even thought the cases are increasing, all they do is just increase the pandemic's level.

Then people can't go outside freely with their friends or other people, so COVID-19's number goes down.
>> Then people can't go outside freely with their friends or other people to decrease the number of confirmed cases. 

Then the goverment make their COVID-19 level down so people go outside with a lot of people.
>> Then eventually, they will lower down the level again. 

So the number of COVID-19 is increasing a lot, so the goverment make the level up again.
>> And then when it increases again, they will rise the level again. 

So this is repeated a lot of time, and that's why Korea can't make down the number of COVID-19.
>> This is repeated a lot of times that's why the cases don't go down. 

So I think it is better to keep COVID-19 level up, so if we do that, there will be no more COVID-19 patient.
>> So I think it is better to keep COVID-19 level up, so if we do that, there will be no more COVID-19 patients. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109464 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 350
109463 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 372
109462 The most livable in my country ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 1
109461 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 351
109460 Homework Ç¥*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 4
109459 I want to be a cat! Among the small ones. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 323
109458 What Korean policy/law do you think should be removed? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 360
109457 What do you consider in buying a house or apartment? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 334
109456 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 339
109455 What do you need to do, so you could do a half day at work? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 364
109454 HW ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 0
109453 What Korean policy/law do you think should be removed? ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 333
109452 Do you want to work on weekends? Why or why not? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 425
109451 Do you think it is important to wear fashionable clothes? Why or... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 1
109450 What Korean policy/law do you think should be removed? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 0
109449 Man fined for running unauthorized school teaching US curriculum À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 1
109448 What are the pros and cons of keeping a pet? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 1
109447 What makes your city more special than the other ones in South... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 384
109446 How important is music to you? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 2
109445 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04