¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Has technology made our lives easier or more complicated?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*¿ø
2021-07-19 249

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes, I think Work we don¡¯t replaced technology.
We has more convenient and easier according to technology. Technology more cheaper than people. So we are losing job. This make complicate in our life.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Won! ^^

Some people say that technology has complicated our lifestyle, but in most cases, it has been beneficial in terms of making life convenient. Firstly, it has made human life very easy, especially related to connecting with friends and their loved ones and sharing content and info around the world easily.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Yes, I think Work we don¡¯t replaced technology.
>> Yes, I think we shouldn't replace technology. 

We has more convenient and easier according to technology. 
>> Our lives has been more convenient and easier because of technology.

Technology more cheaper than people.
>> Using technology can be cheaper than hiring people. 

 So we are losing job. 
>> This is why people are loosing jobs. 

This make complicate in our life.
>> This makes our lived more complicated. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111344 Writing task: What are some of the advantages and disadvantages... Á¶*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 0
111343 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 308
111342 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 296
111341 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 363
111340 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 311
111339 Zero Waste Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 305
111338 Do you think the future will be better or worse for the next... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 1
111337 What are the good things and bad things about living in South... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 311
111336 What are the good things and bad things about living in South... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 0
111335 What do you think is the best city in Korea and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 0
111334 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 1
111333 What are the good things and bad things about living in South... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 325
111332 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 376
111331 Decorate Your Bedroom ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 271
111330 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 3
111329 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 309
111328 This, that, these, or those ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 2
111327 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 4
111326 Is it possible to avoid conflicts totally in our life? Why or... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 1
111325 20th homework Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04