¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Has technology made our lives easier or more complicated?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*¿ø
2021-07-19 442

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes, I think Work we don¡¯t replaced technology.
We has more convenient and easier according to technology. Technology more cheaper than people. So we are losing job. This make complicate in our life.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Won! ^^

Some people say that technology has complicated our lifestyle, but in most cases, it has been beneficial in terms of making life convenient. Firstly, it has made human life very easy, especially related to connecting with friends and their loved ones and sharing content and info around the world easily.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Yes, I think Work we don¡¯t replaced technology.
>> Yes, I think we shouldn't replace technology. 

We has more convenient and easier according to technology. 
>> Our lives has been more convenient and easier because of technology.

Technology more cheaper than people.
>> Using technology can be cheaper than hiring people. 

 So we are losing job. 
>> This is why people are loosing jobs. 

This make complicate in our life.
>> This makes our lived more complicated. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108684 Describe your greatest fear in an essay. Give at least five (5)... º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-20 1
108683 Interview Q ±Ç*½Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-05-20 0
108682 What is a unique way of punctuation or writing in Korea that... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 2
108681 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 929
108680 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 1102
108679 Do you think sending your loved ones to nursing homes is a kind... Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 2
108678 HOMEWORK Á¤*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 0
108677 Report3 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 542
108676 Report2 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 601
108675 Report1 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 818
108674 Homework (286) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 642
108673 Do you think sending your loved ones to nursing homes is a kind... ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 503
108672 How much television do you watch a day? What are the positive... ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 970
108671 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 1200
108670 Twenty Gogae game ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 532
108669 How do you take care of your body? ÇÏ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 727
108668 Describe your favorite day of the week in an essay. º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 3
108667 Homework º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 3
108666 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 542
108665 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-19 738

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04