¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK: ESSAY: Do you think smoking areas should be totally gone? Explain.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼­
2021-07-22 489

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't think completely disappear smoking areas. Because smoker can't suddenly stop smoking. If the smoking areas completely disappear, I think they are more smoking than there was smoking areas. therefore, I think it's good to have smoking areas.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Min Seo,

Thank you for taking time to answer your homework only proves that you are really serious in improving your English skill. 
Please do check the corrections and hope it helped you. If you have any concerns, just do ask me about it. 

Have a wonderful night!

Your truly,
Teacher Annie




ESSAY: Do you think smoking areas should be totally gone? Explain.

I don't think completely disappear smoking areas. Because smoker can't suddenly stop smoking. 
>>> I don't think that the complete disappearance of smoking areas would help because smokers cannot suddenly stop smoking that easily.

If the smoking areas completely disappear, I think they are more smoking than there was smoking areas. 
>>> I think a lot of people will smoke anywhere if smoking areas will be completely gone, even in public places. 

therefore, I think it's good to have smoking areas.
>>> Therefore, I think it's good to have smoking areas; better than not having any.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112330 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 0
112329 Homework {09/29} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 423
112328 How different do you think is the generation now from the... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 0
112327 How different do you think is the generation now from the... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 361
112326 If you can make a rule in your school, what would it be and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 0
112325 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 653
112324 homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 3
112323 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 4
112322 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 5
112321 What do you miss most about your life preCOVID19? ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 378
112320 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 403
112319 Do children learn bad habits at school or at home? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 0
112318 Computer ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 444
112317 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 441
112316 what will I do in my free time with my friends ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 402
112315 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 390
112314 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 3
112313 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 1
112312 How different do you think is the generation now from the... ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 409
112311 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04