¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK: ESSAY: Do you think smoking areas should be totally gone? Explain.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼­
2021-07-22 334

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't think completely disappear smoking areas. Because smoker can't suddenly stop smoking. If the smoking areas completely disappear, I think they are more smoking than there was smoking areas. therefore, I think it's good to have smoking areas.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Min Seo,

Thank you for taking time to answer your homework only proves that you are really serious in improving your English skill. 
Please do check the corrections and hope it helped you. If you have any concerns, just do ask me about it. 

Have a wonderful night!

Your truly,
Teacher Annie




ESSAY: Do you think smoking areas should be totally gone? Explain.

I don't think completely disappear smoking areas. Because smoker can't suddenly stop smoking. 
>>> I don't think that the complete disappearance of smoking areas would help because smokers cannot suddenly stop smoking that easily.

If the smoking areas completely disappear, I think they are more smoking than there was smoking areas. 
>>> I think a lot of people will smoke anywhere if smoking areas will be completely gone, even in public places. 

therefore, I think it's good to have smoking areas.
>>> Therefore, I think it's good to have smoking areas; better than not having any.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110315 home work on July 27 ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 1
110314 Moon Considers Pardons for Ex-President Park, Smasung Chief À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 0
110313 What would you say is the best time of year to visit your town... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 146
110312 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 4
110311 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 197
110310 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 185
110309 homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 207
110308 What is one difference between education in Korea and education... ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 190
110307 Failure is the mother of success. ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 200
110306 Which one do you think is better, working in Korea or working in... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-26 245
110305 If you can make your own holiday, what would it be? When should... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-26 204
110304 HOMEWORK ±Ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-26 168
110303 What do you think is the color for happiness? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-26 0
110302 to work in other country ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-26 191
110301 homework Àü*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-26 193
110300 holiday ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-26 254
110299 Weightlifting in Tokyo Olympics ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-26 177
110298 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-26 200
110297 living on the beach. ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-26 149
110296 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-26 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04