¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK: ESSAY: Do you think smoking areas should be totally gone? Explain.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼­
2021-07-22 586

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't think completely disappear smoking areas. Because smoker can't suddenly stop smoking. If the smoking areas completely disappear, I think they are more smoking than there was smoking areas. therefore, I think it's good to have smoking areas.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Min Seo,

Thank you for taking time to answer your homework only proves that you are really serious in improving your English skill. 
Please do check the corrections and hope it helped you. If you have any concerns, just do ask me about it. 

Have a wonderful night!

Your truly,
Teacher Annie




ESSAY: Do you think smoking areas should be totally gone? Explain.

I don't think completely disappear smoking areas. Because smoker can't suddenly stop smoking. 
>>> I don't think that the complete disappearance of smoking areas would help because smokers cannot suddenly stop smoking that easily.

If the smoking areas completely disappear, I think they are more smoking than there was smoking areas. 
>>> I think a lot of people will smoke anywhere if smoking areas will be completely gone, even in public places. 

therefore, I think it's good to have smoking areas.
>>> Therefore, I think it's good to have smoking areas; better than not having any.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108996 I think that it is good to endure anger as possible as. ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-01 520
108995 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-01 1
108994 Do you prefer baths or showers? Is it better to take a bath /... È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-01 1
108993 today\'s homework ÀÓ*ÃÑ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-01 622
108992 HM-4 ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 659
108991 [05/27]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 1
108990 Homework (294) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 478
108989 Do you think it¡¯s good to share photos on social media? ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 540
108988 [05/26]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 1
108987 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 520
108986 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 481
108985 Complain about jobs ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 1
108984 homework of friday ±è*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 484
108983 Beauty ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 580
108982 [05/25]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 3
108981 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 615
108980 How can you develop a good habit? ÇÏ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 538
108979 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 0
108978 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 0
108977 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04