¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Which one do you think is better, working in Korea or working in a different country? Explain your a

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-07-27 454

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, I think working in Korea is better than working in a different country.
First, Korea is my home country, so I can communicate with them very natuarally with Korea language.
Second, Korea is low birth rate while a lot of jobs are made.
Because of it, we can get a job more easly than a different country.
And third, my country, Korea improving a lot of technologies.
So I think working in Korea is better than working in a different country.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! ^^

There are many reasons why working abroad will benefit both yourself personally, and your career. Two of the most obvious (yet still important) are: Better career opportunities and prospects: Depending on your skill set, there may be a greater range of career opportunities open to you outside your home market.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

In my opinion, I think working in Korea is better than working in a different country.
>> CORRECT

First, Korea is my home country, so I can communicate with them very natuarally with Korea language.
>>First, Korea is my home country so I can communicate with them very naturally with the Korean language.

Second, Korea is low birth rate while a lot of jobs are made.
>>
Second, Korea has a low birth rate while a lot of jobs are made.

Because of it, we can get a job more easly than a different country.
>>Because of it, we can get a job more easily here than a different country.

And third, my country, Korea improving a lot of technologies.
>> Technologies here are also improving a lot. 

So I think working in Korea is better than working in a different country.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112029 Hi Kate! ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 5
112028 What period of history would you like to go back and live in?... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 639
112027 Do you often take naps? If so, how long do you nap for? If not,... ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 560
112026 Do you know of any interesting ways to explore your town or city? ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 470
112025 9/15 I will be success!!! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 431
112024 Why do we need to know the time ? Why do we need calendals. À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 1
112023 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 520
112022 amusements homework Á¤*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 470
112021 Keep health by exercising ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 473
112020 Why do some people love reading? Çã*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 0
112019 Do you want to be a boss someday? What characteristic of a boss... ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 3
112018 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 617
112017 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 0
112016 What period of history would you like to go back and live in?... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 2
112015 What are the traditional things that Koreans do during Chu Seok? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 1
112014 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 0
112013 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 368
112012 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 554
112011 What is your favorite Korean custom? Á¤*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 2
112010 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-15 521

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04