¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Which one do you think is better, working in Korea or working in a different country? Explain your a

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-07-27 408

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, I think working in Korea is better than working in a different country.
First, Korea is my home country, so I can communicate with them very natuarally with Korea language.
Second, Korea is low birth rate while a lot of jobs are made.
Because of it, we can get a job more easly than a different country.
And third, my country, Korea improving a lot of technologies.
So I think working in Korea is better than working in a different country.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! ^^

There are many reasons why working abroad will benefit both yourself personally, and your career. Two of the most obvious (yet still important) are: Better career opportunities and prospects: Depending on your skill set, there may be a greater range of career opportunities open to you outside your home market.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

In my opinion, I think working in Korea is better than working in a different country.
>> CORRECT

First, Korea is my home country, so I can communicate with them very natuarally with Korea language.
>>First, Korea is my home country so I can communicate with them very naturally with the Korean language.

Second, Korea is low birth rate while a lot of jobs are made.
>>
Second, Korea has a low birth rate while a lot of jobs are made.

Because of it, we can get a job more easly than a different country.
>>Because of it, we can get a job more easily here than a different country.

And third, my country, Korea improving a lot of technologies.
>> Technologies here are also improving a lot. 

So I think working in Korea is better than working in a different country.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109359 Why is English fluency significant for you? ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 473
109358 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 1
109357 Do you think change is good? Why or why not? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 0
109356 Free Talking ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 431
109355 I don\'t like strong scents like hair loss prevention, and the... ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 410
109354 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 454
109353 Homework . Claire ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 363
109352 Do you think change is good? Why or why not? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 429
109351 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 463
109350 Some people believe that individuals are becoming more and more... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 459
109349 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 452
109348 Homework. ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 350
109347 Do you think change is good? Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 0
109346 Is voting an important responsibility of a citizen? Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 0
109345 tell me about your city ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 407
109344 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 1
109343 Homework😀 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 451
109342 Celebrities call on G7 to share vaccines with poor nation À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 2
109341 Korean Open More Stock Accounts Than Bank Accounts À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 2
109340 Please use them in a sentence: ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04