¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Which one do you think is better, working in Korea or working in a different country? Explain your a

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-07-27 474

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, I think working in Korea is better than working in a different country.
First, Korea is my home country, so I can communicate with them very natuarally with Korea language.
Second, Korea is low birth rate while a lot of jobs are made.
Because of it, we can get a job more easly than a different country.
And third, my country, Korea improving a lot of technologies.
So I think working in Korea is better than working in a different country.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! ^^

There are many reasons why working abroad will benefit both yourself personally, and your career. Two of the most obvious (yet still important) are: Better career opportunities and prospects: Depending on your skill set, there may be a greater range of career opportunities open to you outside your home market.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

In my opinion, I think working in Korea is better than working in a different country.
>> CORRECT

First, Korea is my home country, so I can communicate with them very natuarally with Korea language.
>>First, Korea is my home country so I can communicate with them very naturally with the Korean language.

Second, Korea is low birth rate while a lot of jobs are made.
>>
Second, Korea has a low birth rate while a lot of jobs are made.

Because of it, we can get a job more easly than a different country.
>>Because of it, we can get a job more easily here than a different country.

And third, my country, Korea improving a lot of technologies.
>> Technologies here are also improving a lot. 

So I think working in Korea is better than working in a different country.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108933 Mammals Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 687
108932 Homework Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 534
108931 HOMEWORK Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 604
108930 prefer taking shower or bath? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 518
108929 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 698
108928 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 3
108927 WRITING TASK: Please explain this Chinese Proverb, ¡°The gem... ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 1
108926 writing check up ¾È*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 1
108925 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 816
108924 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 1
108923 Task ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 1018
108922 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 693
108921 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 967
108920 today\'s homework ÀÓ*ÃÑ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 558
108919 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 504
108918 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-05-28 545
108917 HM-3 ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 637
108916 Do you share photos on social media? Why? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 3
108915 Would you rather be a very rich person with no serious... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 796
108914 Homework (292) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 603

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04