¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

dish

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*¿µ
2021-07-29 156

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

There are various foods in the world. Among them, the dish I want to learn the most is pasta. Because learning pasta is useful. My family often invites guests to my house, when my parents make pasta. So I would like to treat someone to my house with pasta someday. There are various kinds of pasta, so I can make it all if I learn basic methods.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Yeong! ^^

Wow that sounds good! I think everyone will like your cooking if you do that. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

There are various foods in the world. 
>> CORRECT

Among them, the dish I want to learn the most is pasta. Because learning pasta is useful. 
>>Among them, the dish I want to learn the most is pasta because learning how to make it is useful. 

My family often invites guests to my house, when my parents make pasta. 
>> My family often invites guests to my house when my parents make pasta. 

So I would like to treat someone to my house with pasta someday. 
>> So I would like to treat someone with pasta when they come to my house. 

There are various kinds of pasta, so I can make it all if I learn basic methods.
>>There are various kinds of pasta so I can make it all if I learn the basic methods.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110275 What were the decisions you wish you never made? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-26 185
110274 If you can make your own holiday, what would it be? When should... ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-26 145
110273 If you can make your own holiday, what would it be? When should... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-25 0
110272 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-25 215
110271 HOMEWORK ±Ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-24 192
110270 HOMEWORK ±Ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-24 231
110269 HOMEWORK ±Ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-24 190
110268 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-24 1
110267 Fastest ground vehicle globally : China unveils 600 kph maglev... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-24 1
110266 Korea still tops suicide rate among OECD countries À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-24 1
110265 How to sleep comfortably through tropical nights À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-24 2
110264 China denies power outages in provinces À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-24 1
110263 How do you treat a cold? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-23 1
110262 Page 49 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-23 220
110261 Cut down from my life. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-23 0
110260 What has changed in your life since last year? ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-23 182
110259 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-23 235
110258 homework Àü*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-23 167
110257 Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-07-23 177
110256 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-23 192

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04