¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are your greatest achievements?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Çö
2021-08-02 250

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My recently greatest achievement about my major is the minister of environment award which is top prize of Integrated environmental management competition.
Environmental management can't be taken separately, because contents (air, water, ground, biosphere) effect each other.
The government thought the Integrated management is needed and made the way and program before some years.
Korea environment corporation which is a government institute started this contest to make future experts.
I was team leader, and my team spent summer vacation to take this project.
We performed new program ourselves finding how to use, and made integrated structure of treated processes.
It was very difficult, but our enough conversation and understanding each other made our project to be successful.
Others are supporters activity of K-water, the prize of another environmental contest, great score of school, and etc..
I want to make my every moment be achievements. I love challenges, so I can't stop always.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Kang!

Thanks for your answer.  I hope you read the corrections and practice them with your heart and mind. :)


-T. Maine   


My recently greatest achievement about my major is the minister of environment award which is top prize of Integrated environmental management competition.

>>My recent greatest achievement in my major is being awarded as the minister of environment which is a top prize of the competition in the Integrated Environmental Management.
 Environmental management can't be taken separately, because contents (air, water, ground, biosphere) effect each other.

>>Environmental management can't be taken separately because the components such as air, water, ground, and biosphere affect each other.
 The government thought the Integrated management is needed and made the way and program before some years.

>>The government thought the Integrated Management is needed, so they made a way to improve the program for some years.
 Korea environment corporation which is a government institute started this contest to make future experts.

>>Correct!

>>OR: Korea environmental corporation which is a government institute started this contest to build future experts.
 I was team leader, and my team spent summer vacation to take this project. 

>>I was a team leader and my team spent our summer vacation for this project.
 We performed new program ourselves finding how to use, and made integrated structure of treated processes.

>>We performed new progrmas ourselves finding how to use and make integrated structures of treated processes.
 It was very difficult, but our enough conversation and understanding each other made our project to be successful.

>>It was really a tough work.  However, through our communication and understanding with each other, our project was a sucess.
 Others are supporters activity of K-water, the prize of another environmental contest, great score of school, and etc..

>>Others support certain activities such as K-water, the prize of another environmental contest, having a great score at school, and many more.
 I want to make my every moment be achievements. I love challenges, so I can't stop always.

>>I want to make every moment of my life to be full of achievements.  I love challenges, so I can't stop myself from moving forward towards success.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109861 What country would you like to visit and why? ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 271
109860 home work ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 2
109859 Homework ¹é*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 11
109858 Trust ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 264
109857 Have a good day Queeny! ¿À*¸° ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 214
109856 What is the first thing that you always do when you visit a new... ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 195
109855 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 252
109854 Do I like small talk? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 307
109853 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 225
109852 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 1
109851 Give me one festival in your hometown that you enjoy the most. ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 221
109850 What are the advantages and disadvantages of working with a... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 2
109849 My favorite sweets treats are Twix, and ABC chocolate. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 238
109848 What do you like most about Korea? ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 211
109847 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 230
109846 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 211
109845 What is the first thing that you always do when you visit a new... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 231
109844 What is the first thing that you always do when you visit a new... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 0
109843 Is getting angry an effective way of dealing with problems? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 2
109842 Homework Ç¥*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 6

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04