¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are your greatest achievements?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Çö
2021-08-02 273

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My recently greatest achievement about my major is the minister of environment award which is top prize of Integrated environmental management competition.
Environmental management can't be taken separately, because contents (air, water, ground, biosphere) effect each other.
The government thought the Integrated management is needed and made the way and program before some years.
Korea environment corporation which is a government institute started this contest to make future experts.
I was team leader, and my team spent summer vacation to take this project.
We performed new program ourselves finding how to use, and made integrated structure of treated processes.
It was very difficult, but our enough conversation and understanding each other made our project to be successful.
Others are supporters activity of K-water, the prize of another environmental contest, great score of school, and etc..
I want to make my every moment be achievements. I love challenges, so I can't stop always.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Kang!

Thanks for your answer.  I hope you read the corrections and practice them with your heart and mind. :)


-T. Maine   


My recently greatest achievement about my major is the minister of environment award which is top prize of Integrated environmental management competition.

>>My recent greatest achievement in my major is being awarded as the minister of environment which is a top prize of the competition in the Integrated Environmental Management.
 Environmental management can't be taken separately, because contents (air, water, ground, biosphere) effect each other.

>>Environmental management can't be taken separately because the components such as air, water, ground, and biosphere affect each other.
 The government thought the Integrated management is needed and made the way and program before some years.

>>The government thought the Integrated Management is needed, so they made a way to improve the program for some years.
 Korea environment corporation which is a government institute started this contest to make future experts.

>>Correct!

>>OR: Korea environmental corporation which is a government institute started this contest to build future experts.
 I was team leader, and my team spent summer vacation to take this project. 

>>I was a team leader and my team spent our summer vacation for this project.
 We performed new program ourselves finding how to use, and made integrated structure of treated processes.

>>We performed new progrmas ourselves finding how to use and make integrated structures of treated processes.
 It was very difficult, but our enough conversation and understanding each other made our project to be successful.

>>It was really a tough work.  However, through our communication and understanding with each other, our project was a sucess.
 Others are supporters activity of K-water, the prize of another environmental contest, great score of school, and etc..

>>Others support certain activities such as K-water, the prize of another environmental contest, having a great score at school, and many more.
 I want to make my every moment be achievements. I love challenges, so I can't stop always.

>>I want to make every moment of my life to be full of achievements.  I love challenges, so I can't stop myself from moving forward towards success.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109594 HW ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 0
109593 What would you say is the best thing about living in your town... ÀÓ*ÃÑ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 2
109592 What do you think about people who have HIV? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 2
109591 homework Àü*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 258
109590 Homework (303) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 278
109589 How can I help a friend? ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 2
109588 My summer activities! ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 464
109587 Do many people in your country study abroad? Why do you think... ÇÏ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 463
109586 After I retire ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 335
109585 What are the advantages and disadvantages of cooking your food... ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 307
109584 If you are very busy at work or at school, do you have ways to... ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 631
109583 What was the most memorable vacation that you had with your... ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 240
109582 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 270
109581 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 250
109580 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 273
109579 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 232
109578 Do you enjoy meeting new people? Why or why not? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 2
109577 What is your cards? ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 284
109576 Do many people in your country study abroad? Why do you think... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 1
109575 If you are very busy at work or at school, do you have ways to... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-23 248

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04