¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are your greatest achievements?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Çö
2021-08-02 461

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My recently greatest achievement about my major is the minister of environment award which is top prize of Integrated environmental management competition.
Environmental management can't be taken separately, because contents (air, water, ground, biosphere) effect each other.
The government thought the Integrated management is needed and made the way and program before some years.
Korea environment corporation which is a government institute started this contest to make future experts.
I was team leader, and my team spent summer vacation to take this project.
We performed new program ourselves finding how to use, and made integrated structure of treated processes.
It was very difficult, but our enough conversation and understanding each other made our project to be successful.
Others are supporters activity of K-water, the prize of another environmental contest, great score of school, and etc..
I want to make my every moment be achievements. I love challenges, so I can't stop always.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Kang!

Thanks for your answer.  I hope you read the corrections and practice them with your heart and mind. :)


-T. Maine   


My recently greatest achievement about my major is the minister of environment award which is top prize of Integrated environmental management competition.

>>My recent greatest achievement in my major is being awarded as the minister of environment which is a top prize of the competition in the Integrated Environmental Management.
 Environmental management can't be taken separately, because contents (air, water, ground, biosphere) effect each other.

>>Environmental management can't be taken separately because the components such as air, water, ground, and biosphere affect each other.
 The government thought the Integrated management is needed and made the way and program before some years.

>>The government thought the Integrated Management is needed, so they made a way to improve the program for some years.
 Korea environment corporation which is a government institute started this contest to make future experts.

>>Correct!

>>OR: Korea environmental corporation which is a government institute started this contest to build future experts.
 I was team leader, and my team spent summer vacation to take this project. 

>>I was a team leader and my team spent our summer vacation for this project.
 We performed new program ourselves finding how to use, and made integrated structure of treated processes.

>>We performed new progrmas ourselves finding how to use and make integrated structures of treated processes.
 It was very difficult, but our enough conversation and understanding each other made our project to be successful.

>>It was really a tough work.  However, through our communication and understanding with each other, our project was a sucess.
 Others are supporters activity of K-water, the prize of another environmental contest, great score of school, and etc..

>>Others support certain activities such as K-water, the prize of another environmental contest, having a great score at school, and many more.
 I want to make my every moment be achievements. I love challenges, so I can't stop always.

>>I want to make every moment of my life to be full of achievements.  I love challenges, so I can't stop myself from moving forward towards success.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109883 What illegal trade does your country have? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 1
109882 What kind of support should children give their aging parents? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 466
109881 homework on July 7 ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 2
109880 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 1
109879 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 0
109878 What one thing do you want to change about yourself? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 403
109877 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 428
109876 Homrwork ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 395
109875 HeforShe Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 306
109874 What are the advantages and disadvantages of working with a... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 531
109873 My dream house ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 1
109872 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 416
109871 South Korean remaining in Afghanistan urged to leave by July :... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 1
109870 What are the good effects and bad effects of junk food? ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 358
109869 How can we prevent or avoid having a vice? ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 1050
109868 Some people today prefer to get advice for medical problems and... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 359
109867 Do you think our lives have been improved by the Internet? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 1
109866 Do you use your real name on the Internet? Why or why not? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 0
109865 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 5
109864 My feeling when l oversleep ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-07 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04