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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Many students find it difficult to focus or pay attention on online classes. What are the reasons fo

작성자: 황*하
2021-08-02 390

회원님의 영작문

Students can't go to school due to pandemic these days. The government and school were preparing online contents for students and They succeeded offering quite successful contents after many trial and error. However, students couldn't focus on the class because there are a lot of things they could enjoy around them such as computer and TV. Actually, students didn't have right to select. They did it involuntarily. School doesn't exist to teach children knowledge, it is learnt how to socialize and construct students' habits. There have been a lot of adverse effect since schools carried out online class. Students don't want to wake up early and wash their face up in the morning. They just turned the computer on before the first class time and wore only top because it is not showed on the monitor although they don't wear pants. I don't think there are good ways to make students focusing on the class. The only solution is attending school and meeting teachers and friends at school.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day Mr. Hwang! It's raining cats and dogs here. How are you doing there? I envy you because you're always with the sunshine kkk. Enjoy the rest of your day! See you!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Students can't go to school due to pandemic these days. 
>>> CORRECT
The government and school were preparing online contents for students and They succeeded offering quite successful contents after many trial and error.
>>> The government and school were preparing online contents for students and they succeeded offering quite successful contents after many trials and errors.
 However, students couldn't focus on the class because there are a lot of things they could enjoy around them such as computer and TV. 
>>> CORRECT
Actually, students didn't have right to select.
>>> Actually, students didn't have the right to choose.
 They did it involuntarily.
>>> CORRECT
 School doesn't exist to teach children knowledge, it is learnt how to socialize and construct students' habits.
>>> CORRECT
 There have been a lot of adverse effect since schools carried out online class.
>>>  There have been a lot of adverse effects since schools carried out online classes.
 Students don't want to wake up early and wash their face up in the morning.
>>> CORRECT
 They just turned the computer on before the first class time and wore only top because it is not showed on the monitor although they don't wear pants. 
>>>  They just turned the computer on before their first class and wore their tops because it is not showed on the monitor if they don't wear pants. 
I don't think there are good ways to make students focusing on the class. 
>>> I don't think there are good ways to make students focus on class. 
The only solution is attending school and meeting teachers and friends at school.
>>> CORRECT
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