¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think should the government about the homeless people on the streets?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-08-06 228

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my country, Korea, there are very few homeless people in the streets, and I've never seen homeless people in Korea.
But if there are a lot of homeless people in the streets, I think the goverment have to educate them.
They can't earn the money because they don't ahve any chance about getting job or earning money.
And the reason that they can't get the chance is they don't know any knowledge or technologies.
And if they want to learn those kinds of studies or skills, they have to learn about it.
But they don't have any money, so they can't learn any studies or skills that can make them to get the chance.
So I think if goverment educate them or give a chance that can study something, they will be able to do something or get a job.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! ^^

There¡¯s never a good time to lack shelter, but the return of cold weather presents particular challenges for people experiencing homelessness. The sight of someone on the street in fall and winter compels us to make an effort to help. But it can be difficult to know how to make the greatest impact. Your suggestion is great!

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

In my country, Korea, there are very few homeless people in the streets, and I've never seen homeless people in Korea.
>> In my country, Korea, there are a few homeless people on the streets. I actually have never seen homeless people here. 

But if there are a lot of homeless people in the streets, I think the goverment have to educate them.
>> But if there was, I think the government should educate them. 

They can't earn the money because they don't ahve any chance about getting job or earning money.
They can't earn the money because they don't have any chance to get a job or earn money. 00

And the reason that they can't get the chance is they don't know any knowledge or technologies.
>> The reason why they can't get a job is because they don't have enough knowledge  nor have any technologies. 

And if they want to learn those kinds of studies or skills, they have to learn about it.
>> If they want to learn these skills, they have to study it. 

But they don't have any money, so they can't learn any studies or skills that can make them to get the chance.
>> They might not have any money so they might not be able to do so. 

So I think if goverment educate them or give a chance that can study something, they will be able to do something or get a job.
>> So I think the government should educate them or give them a chance to study. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110763 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 2
110762 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 2
110761 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 183
110760 How do you choose the books you are going to read? ye*nhi ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 2
110759 Home work ½É*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 5
110758 Page 17 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 148
110757 What is your most luxurious possession? Á¶*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 155
110756 10th homework Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 2
110755 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 3
110754 21/08/11 homework ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 154
110753 Months ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 177
110752 Homework 8.11 Àå*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 182
110751 Abuse of senior citizens rising À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 1
110750 correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 3
110749 email ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 201
110748 home work on Aug 11 ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 1
110747 Are you a foodie or a picky eater? Tell me what made you... ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 190
110746 Homwork À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 198
110745 home work on Aug 9 ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 1
110744 Are you well-adjusted to urban living? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 251

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04