¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Few people devote time to hobbies nowadays. Say why you think this is the case and what effect this

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Çã*¿¬
2021-08-09 348

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Nowdays, few people spend time to enjoy their hobbies. I believe that the problem is related to some reasons. First of all, I think that because people have to earn money for their future, people have no enough time to devote. For example, my brother also works even for the weekend. Since he has a dream to be an actor, he earns the money for attending an academy that helps him to be an actor. Second, I believe that the covid-19 also has effects on that. To be safe, people should stay their home. This make people not enjoy their hobbies.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Ji Yeon!  Thanks you for your thoughts about this issue. 
T. Irene
Nowadays, few people spend time to enjoy their hobbies. 
>>> Correct. 
I believe that the problem is related to some reasons. 
>>> I believe there are some reason to this. 
First of all, I think that because people have to earn money for their future, people have no enough time to devote. 
>>> First of all, I think that because people have to earn money for their future, people have not enough time to devote for their hobbies. 
For example, my brother also works even for the weekend. 
>>> For example, my brother also works even on the weekends. 
Since he has a dream to be an actor, he earns the money for attending an academy that helps him to be an actor. 
>>> Since he has a dream to be an actor, he needs to earn money for attending an academy that will help him to be an actor. 
Second, I believe that the covid-19 also has effects on that. 
>>> Second, I believe that the covid-19 also had an effect on how people enjoy their hobbies. 
To be safe, people should stay their home. 
>>> To be safe, people should stay in their homes. 
This make people not enjoy their hobbies.
>>> This makes people not enjoy their hobbies.




¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110609 Can you think of a device that makes people\'s lives easier? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 0
110608 What\'s your favorite word in English? Why do you like it? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 0
110607 Page 4 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 318
110606 What do you think would happen if there was only one language in... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 387
110605 Happiness and money ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 300
110604 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 362
110603 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 2
110602 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 282
110601 August 4th and 5th homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 471
110600 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 0
110599 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 1
110598 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 0
110597 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 1
110596 Email -2 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 337
110595 Email -1 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 407
110594 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 1
110593 Day 3 homework ³²*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 392
110592 Do you think the younger generation is much more progressive?... ye*nhi ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 2
110591 What do you think should the government about the homeless... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 0
110590 Do you think it\'s necessary to move out of your parents house... ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-05 289

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04