¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why do you apply for Finland? - interview script

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Çö
2021-08-10 330

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Finland is eco-friendly nation. It has 6th grade of Energy transition index, so It is one of best nations of transition into low carbon energy. It has many architecture which is collaborated around environment. It has many eco policy too.
Helsinki is best environment city. The city¡¯s goals are sustainable life and carbon neutrality. So It has many place for that, and the citizens have eco- friendly life too.
I need to have a sense of duty to be an expert about environment engineering. So I want to learn this life ways as well as advanced environmental engineering. It is why I applied this country.
Moreover, Finland education system has many team projects. I can carry out the activities smoothly.

*please let me know what contents are needed and omit. I want to make more fluently each sentence.
*I don't know how to write conclude sentences.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Kang!

Thank you for letting me check your script.  I hope you read the corrections as well. ^^


-T. Maine


Finland is eco-friendly nation.

>>Finland is an eco-friendly nation.

It has 6th grade of Energy transition index, so It is one of best nations of transition into low carbon energy.

>>It is considered to have the 6th grade of energy in the transition index, so it is one of the best nations which is changing to the usage of low carbon energy.

It has many architecture which is collaborated around environment. It has many eco policy too.

>>It has many infrastructures which are collaborated with the environment. It has an eco-friendly policy, too.
 Helsinki is best environment city. The city¡¯s goals are sustainable life and carbon neutrality.

>>Helsinki is the best environmental city.  The city's goals are sustainable to life and carbon neutrally.

So It has many place for that, and the citizens have eco- friendly life too.

>>Most of the places, as well as the citizens are for the proctection of the environment.
 I need to have a sense of duty to be an expert about environment engineering.

>>I need to gain more knowledge and skills to be an expert in environmental engineering.

So I want to learn this life ways as well as advanced environmental engineering.

>>So I want to learn how people live in sustainable lives as well as advance my understanding in environmental engineering.

It is why I applied this country.

>>That's why I choose this country to study.
 Moreover, Finland education system has many team projects. I can carry out the activities smoothly.

>>Moreover, Finland's education system has many team projects which are helpful to improve my skills and develop myself.



 *please let me know what contents are needed and omit. I want to make more fluently each sentence.
*I don't know how to write conclude sentences.



¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111383 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 478
111382 How do you manage a tight schedule? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 335
111381 Do you think it\'s disrespectful to argue with your elders? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111380 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 2
111379 HOMEWORK : Why do women like shopping more than men? ¹Ú*Âù ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 5
111378 Do you think the age for driving should be raised or lowered? ¼Û*¾È ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 0
111377 Sentimental value ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 406
111376 What is special about your city? Tell me 3-5 things that a... È«*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 453
111375 What do you imagine are the best countries in which to raise a... ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 406
111374 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 2
111373 If you can eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 503
111372 Should refugees have equal rights with Koreans at work? Share... Á¤*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 339
111371 Plz cancel today¡¯s class ¼Û*ö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 511
111370 IELTS writing task1 line graph ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111369 How do you greet someone you just met? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 514
111368 page 13 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-29 484
111367 Homework 8.30 Àå*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-08-29 732
111366 What is the most exciting thing you have ever done? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-29 381
111365 wage ceiling? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-29 495
111364 9 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-29 476

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04