¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Many people put their personal information online (address, telephone number, and so on) for purpose

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-08-11 418

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't understand why most websites want users to put their personal information regardless of the type of business. I can provide it to a bank because it deals with money for customers so they need to identify customer's information every step. However, I don't think portal sites have to confirm user's ID when they want to join it because it's just search engine, there aren't potential harm to users and providers too. The government have implemented the different type of identification system due to the complexity of joining websites and inconvenience of installing various firewall programs. People have experienced to install those programs. Most of them spent a lot of time to install it and have been encountered difficulties because of many reasons like program problem itself, hardware and users' skills. I know that privacy have to be first things whose company consider but they also are needed to care the user's convenience too. I think that it would be good to use smart phone.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Mr. Hwang~! Happy Thursday! How are you doing? I hope you're doing  great. Well, I'm hungry now... hahaha See you tomorrow!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I don't understand why most websites want users to put their personal information regardless of the type of business. 
>>> CORRECT
I can provide it to a bank because it deals with money for customers so they need to identify customer's information every step.
>>> I can provide it to the bank because it deals with money for customers so they need to identify the customer's information in every step.
 However, I don't think portal sites have to confirm user's ID when they want to join it because it's just search engine, there aren't potential harm to users and providers too. 
>>>  However, I don't think portal sites have to confirm user's ID when they want to join on it because it's just a search engine, there aren't potential harms to users and providers too. 
The government have implemented the different type of identification system due to the complexity of joining websites and inconvenience of installing various firewall programs. 
>>> The government has implemented the different types of identification systems due to the complexity of joining websites and inconveniency of installing various firewall programs. 
People have experienced to install those programs. 
>>> People have experienced installing those programs. 
Most of them spent a lot of time to install it and have been encountered difficulties because of many reasons like program problem itself, hardware and users' skills.
>>> Most of them spent a lot of time to install it and had encountered difficulties because of many reasons like program problem itself, hardware and users' skills.
 I know that privacy have to be first things whose company consider but they also are needed to care the user's convenience too.
>>>  I know that privacy had to be the first thing whose company consider but they're also needed to take care of the user's convenience too.
 I think that it would be good to use smart phone.
>>> I think it would be better to use smart phone.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110236 Corona ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-23 335
110235 How do you stop hiccups? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 0
110234 Do you think that endangered species should be kept in captive... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 324
110233 home work on July 22 ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 1
110232 Cut ties ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 3
110231 A good education! ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 357
110230 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 589
110229 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 1
110228 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 402
110227 Are you a spender or a saver of money? Why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 405
110226 Do you think that endangered species should be kept in captive... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 2
110225 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 345
110224 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 2
110223 What kind of games or toys did you play when you were young? Do... ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 433
110222 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 328
110221 Page 44 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 310
110220 Homework ¾ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 295
110219 Have / If S had pp, ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 407
110218 HOMEWORK: ESSAY: Do you think smoking areas should be totally... ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-22 476
110217 Homework 7.22 Àå*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 383

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04