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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Interview script of international exchange student program

작성자: 이*현
2021-08-12 290

회원님의 영작문

1.
When I’m in unfamiliar place, I’m very interested. When I meet new people, I can start a converstion first. Since I was a child, when I enrolled in new school, I didn’t have difficult. Instead, I was excited the new condition.
Overseas country may be more unfamiliar. But I often traveled other countries. When I’m in them, I try to understand new culture. It is fun things to me. I loved the new mood, so I became to love abroad travel.
Therefore, I can adapt in abroad life.

2.
I think I’m like a whale which is king of the sea.
I usually have leader position in any groups like whale.
Whale’s load is all of sea. It is very wide.
I have wide view like whale, so I can easily understand another culture.
Whale is biggest in the sea. Even if my real body is small, but my mind is growing always.
I always try to make my mind be biggest like a whale.
Plus, I want to biggest expert in my job field in future too.

*please let me know what contents are needed and omit.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Minjun/Clara! 
T. Irene
1.
When I’m in unfamiliar place, I’m very interested. 
>>> I'm very much interested in traveling to unfamiliar places. 
When I meet new people, I can start a converstion first. 
>>> When I meet new people, I always start the conversation first. 
OR
>> When meeting people for the first time, I always like initiating/starting the conversation. 
Since I was a child, when I enrolled in new school, I didn’t have difficult. 
>>> Since I was a child, I never had any difficulty talking or opening up to other students or children in my school. 
Instead, I was excited the new condition.
>>> Whenever I go to a new school, I have always been excited with the thought of exploring a new environment. 
Overseas country may be more unfamiliar. But I often traveled other countries. 
>>> Places in other countries may also be so unfamiliar but I have experienced traveling abroad  too. 
When I’m in them, I try to understand new culture. 
>>> Whenever I'm in there, I try to study and understand the local people's culture. 
It is fun things to me. 
>>> I find that very interesting and enjoyable. 
I loved the new mood, so I became to love abroad travel.
>>> This is the reason I got to love traveling abroad. 
Therefore, I can adapt in abroad life.
>>> And for this same reason, I believe that I can easily adapt to a new life overseas.  
2.
I think I’m like a whale which is king of the sea.
>>> I think I'm like a whale which is considered to be the king of the sea. 
I usually have leader position in any groups like whale.
>>> Like the whale, I'm usually chosen as a leader. 
Whale’s load is all of sea. It is very wide.
>>> This mammal rule the seas and oceans around the world. That's quite a huge kingdom.
I have wide view like whale, so I can easily understand another culture.
>>> Similarly, I am open to new experiences and knowledges so I am always eager to learn other country's culture. 
Whale is biggest in the sea. Even if my real body is small, but my mind is growing always.
>>> Whales are the biggest animals in the sea and even though, I may not have such a body, my knowledge is constantly growing. 
I always try to make my mind be biggest like a whale.
>>> I'm striving to make my mind as big as the whale. 
Plus, I want to biggest expert in my job field in future too.
>>> That means I want to be the number one expert in my field in the future. 

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