¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

¼÷Á¦

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*ºñ
2021-08-12 435

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't think piano learning is important. The reason is that it is unnecessary time for people who are not interesed
in the piano.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Yubi! ^^

Learning to play an instrument can help your child fine-tune her ear and enhance skills needed for education and social interaction. It develops physical skills. It also cultivates social skills. It refines discipline and patience. By learning about and playing a variety of instruments, kids can discover how music plays a critical role in other cultures. It has many benefits. :) Although it should be a personal choice and not mandatory. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I don't think piano learning is important. 
>>I don't think learning how to play the piano is important. 

The reason is that it is unnecessary time for people who are not interesed in the piano.
>>The reason is that it is unnecessary time for people who are not interested in playing the piano. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112481 If you can be reincarnated, what kind of life would you want on... ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 527
112480 37 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 469
112479 Countries ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 438
112478 Write about a memorable experience you had with a favorite... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 395
112477 If I reincarnated ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 443
112476 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 488
112475 If you can be reincarnated, what kind of life would you want on... ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 612
112474 Howework ±Ç*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 1
112473 (Self-introduction) Tell me something about yourself. ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 518
112472 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 509
112471 homework Æí*ö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 554
112470 What kind of person would be the perfect neighbor? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 2
112469 Self introduction2 ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-04 1
112468 Riding a bike À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 3
112467 What are your short-term and long-term goals? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 1
112466 Gaecheonjeol (National Foundation day) ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 655
112465 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 443
112464 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 4
112463 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 453
112462 Personality ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-03 452

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04