무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Do you think piano lessons are important for student\'s learning? Why or why not?

작성자: 류*주
2021-08-12 236

회원님의 영작문

Actually, I don't think that the piano lessens are that much important to student but there are a lot of adventages if students learn the piano.
We can join piano with our friends and in fact, we can develop our brain as well.
If we are playing piano, almost time we have to move our hands differently so we can develop our brain.
And also nerve of hands and brain is connected so playing piano can develop our brain more smarter.
So I think we don't have to learn the piano but if we do, we can get a lot of adventage.
So if there is someone who is thinking about learning the piano or not, I want to recommand learning the piano to him.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi John! ^^

Learning to play an instrument can help your child fine-tune her ear and enhance skills needed for education and social interaction. It develops physical skills. It also cultivates social skills. It refines discipline and patience. By learning about and playing a variety of instruments, kids can discover how music plays a critical role in other cultures. It has many benefits. :) Although it should be a personal choice and not mandatory. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Actually, I don't think that the piano lessens are that much important to student but there are a lot of adventages if students learn the piano.
>> Actually, I don't think that the piano lessons are that much important to students  but there are a lot of advantages if students learn how to play it. 

We can join piano with our friends and in fact, we can develop our brain as well.
>> We can play piano with our friends and in fact, it can help develop our brain as well. 

If we are playing piano, almost time we have to move our hands differently so we can develop our brain.
>> If we are playing the piano, we have to move our hands in different ways. With this, it can help use develop our brain. 

And also nerve of hands and brain is connected so playing piano can develop our brain more smarter.
>> And also, the nerves of our hands and brain is connected. With this, it can make us smarter. 

So I think we don't have to learn the piano but if we do, we can get a lot of adventage.
>> So I think we don't have to learn how to play it  but if we do, we can get a lot of advantage.

So if there is someone who is thinking about learning the piano or not, I want to recommand learning the piano to him.
>> So if there is someone who is thinking about learning the piano or not, I want to recommend it to them. 

번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
111674 What do you think the most common crime in your country is? Do... 선* 완료 2021-09-07 221
111673 Who, besides your parents, had the biggest impact on your... 여*진 완료 2021-09-07 1
111672 Ninja vs samurai 윤*진 완료 2021-09-07 197
111671 How long do you study before your exam? Please tell me about... 류*선 완료 2021-09-07 254
111670 Homework 양*진 완료 2021-09-07 0
111669 What is the best thing about your neighborhood? 서*영 완료 2021-09-07 2
111668 What kind of people do you like best? 주*석 완료 2021-09-07 241
111667 How do movie reviews affect your interest in a certain movie? 최*정 완료 2021-09-07 205
111666 special restaurant 정*아 완료 2021-09-06 219
111665 What age do you want to be a mother? Why? 안*윤 완료 2021-09-06 1
111664 IELTS writing task1 신*진 완료 2021-09-06 5
111663 page 33 오*은 완료 2021-09-06 190
111662 숙제 김*비 완료 2021-09-06 205
111661 숙제 김*비 완료 2021-09-06 229
111660 If you can go on a trip with your family, where would it be and... 하*윤 완료 2021-09-06 223
111659 oh my god!!!!!!!!! 오*결 완료 2021-09-06 253
111658 9.6 homework 임*윤 완료 2021-09-06 1
111657 HOMEWORK : How do you introduce yourself to someone? 박*찬 완료 2021-09-06 1
111656 In most of the countries, people prefer to live in a rented... 황*하 완료 2021-09-06 281
111655 How often do you eat out? 김*수 완료 2021-09-06 260

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]