¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think piano lessons are important for student\'s learning? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-08-12 203

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Actually, I don't think that the piano lessens are that much important to student but there are a lot of adventages if students learn the piano.
We can join piano with our friends and in fact, we can develop our brain as well.
If we are playing piano, almost time we have to move our hands differently so we can develop our brain.
And also nerve of hands and brain is connected so playing piano can develop our brain more smarter.
So I think we don't have to learn the piano but if we do, we can get a lot of adventage.
So if there is someone who is thinking about learning the piano or not, I want to recommand learning the piano to him.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! ^^

Learning to play an instrument can help your child fine-tune her ear and enhance skills needed for education and social interaction. It develops physical skills. It also cultivates social skills. It refines discipline and patience. By learning about and playing a variety of instruments, kids can discover how music plays a critical role in other cultures. It has many benefits. :) Although it should be a personal choice and not mandatory. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Actually, I don't think that the piano lessens are that much important to student but there are a lot of adventages if students learn the piano.
>> Actually, I don't think that the piano lessons are that much important to students  but there are a lot of advantages if students learn how to play it. 

We can join piano with our friends and in fact, we can develop our brain as well.
>> We can play piano with our friends and in fact, it can help develop our brain as well. 

If we are playing piano, almost time we have to move our hands differently so we can develop our brain.
>> 
If we are playing the piano, we have to move our hands in different ways. With this, it can help use develop our brain. 

And also nerve of hands and brain is connected so playing piano can develop our brain more smarter.
>> 
And also, the nerves of our hands and brain is connected. With this, it can make us smarter. 

So I think we don't have to learn the piano but if we do, we can get a lot of adventage.
>> 
So I think we don't have to learn how to play it  but if we do, we can get a lot of advantage.

So if there is someone who is thinking about learning the piano or not, I want to recommand learning the piano to him.
>> So if there is someone who is thinking about learning the piano or not, I want to recommend it to them. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110799 What is an important thing to remember when you are a tourist in... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 207
110798 What advice would you give a foreigner visiting your country who... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 214
110797 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 185
110796 A skeptical person ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 1
110795 homework Àü*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 569
110794 Homework Àü*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 191
110793 Do you think piano lessons are important for student\'s... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 0
110792 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 181
110791 email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 222
110790 email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 203
110789 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 1
110788 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 1
110787 Day 7 homework ³²*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 187
110786 If I do hard volunteer, they can get a big happiness! ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 160
110785 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 157
110784 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 1
110783 Homework {08/11} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 171
110782 What advice would you give a foreigner visiting your country who... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 1
110781 What is the most useful thing that you own and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 0
110780 What advice would you give a foreigner visiting your country who... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 176

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04