¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think going to different academies is important for student\'s learning? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*ÁÖ
2021-08-16 447

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Do you think going to different academies is important for student's learning? Why or why not?

The zeal for student's education in Korea is quite high.
So, many students study to the academies after schoolwork.
That's why students don't spend much time in schoolwork.
They think that academy class is the most important.
It has a negarive influence about academcy class.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Monica! ^^

I think this is beneficial for students in terms of preparing for the universities that they are gonna go to in the future. But this can also lessen the time to enjoy you childhood since you would be studying most of the time. It has both advantages and disadvantages. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

The zeal for student's education in Korea is quite high.
>> CORRECT

So, many students study to the academies after schoolwork.
>> So, many students study in academies after school.

That's why students don't spend much time in schoolwork.
>> CORRECT

They think that academy class is the most important.
>> CORRECT

It has a negarive influence about academcy class
>> It has some negative influences to the students. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110190 Japan medical body conditionally approves womb transplants À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 1
110189 If one song were to describe your life, What song would it be? ÀÌ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 391
110188 How can you describe your family? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 2
110187 Task ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 421
110186 Thursday homework ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 402
110185 Are you a spender or a saver of money? Why? ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 519
110184 Homework ¾ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 0
110183 family ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-20 559
110182 What is the worst kind of pollution in your country? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-20 2
110181 Writing: How do you respond to customers\' queries about your... À¯*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-20 350
110180 Cut ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-20 3
110179 Homepoop ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-20 349
110178 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-20 513
110177 I like to eat at home. ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-20 549
110176 HOMEWORK ±Ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-20 340
110175 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-20 0
110174 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-20 0
110173 HOMEWORK ±Ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-20 336
110172 How do you control your anger? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-20 1
110171 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-20 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04