¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think going to different academies is important for student\'s learning? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*ÁÖ
2021-08-16 529

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Do you think going to different academies is important for student's learning? Why or why not?

The zeal for student's education in Korea is quite high.
So, many students study to the academies after schoolwork.
That's why students don't spend much time in schoolwork.
They think that academy class is the most important.
It has a negarive influence about academcy class.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Monica! ^^

I think this is beneficial for students in terms of preparing for the universities that they are gonna go to in the future. But this can also lessen the time to enjoy you childhood since you would be studying most of the time. It has both advantages and disadvantages. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

The zeal for student's education in Korea is quite high.
>> CORRECT

So, many students study to the academies after schoolwork.
>> So, many students study in academies after school.

That's why students don't spend much time in schoolwork.
>> CORRECT

They think that academy class is the most important.
>> CORRECT

It has a negarive influence about academcy class
>> It has some negative influences to the students. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107484 If can be born again, what kind of life would you like to have... Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-04-14 1
107483 How do you greet someone you just met? ½Å*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-14 764
107482 One in three people in Congo suffer from acute hunger, warns... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 1
107481 Writing Exercise: Do you prefer digital photography or film... ±è*ä ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 2
107480 Do you think it\'s important to get physical education in... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 758
107479 If I can be born again ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 805
107478 My toy ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 1022
107477 What is the last place would you visit if you could fly? ±è*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 0
107476 Refund mail ¾È*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 0
107475 Why is it important to greet someone? Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 818
107474 film photography or digital photography? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 650
107473 If can be born again, what kind of life would you like to have... ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 624
107472 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 2
107471 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 2
107470 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 0
107469 Homework (261) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 746
107468 homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 2
107467 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 4
107466 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 624
107465 My new hobby (2) ¾È*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-13 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04