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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What festivals do you have in your city? Can you explain what happens during those occasions?

작성자: 류*주
2021-08-23 480

회원님의 영작문

In my city, there is an animation festival, and during that, anybody can join to the festival.
My city is good at making animations so there are a lot of things about animations in my city.
The most famous things about it are the museum about animation and our city's animation festival.
If we are able to make an animation and we want to join to the festival, then, anybody can join to the festival.
And also in my city, there are a lot of festivals but the most famous festival in my city, is the animation festival.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi John! ^^

Festivals are an expressive way to celebrate glorious heritage, culture and traditions.  They are meant to rejoice special moments and emotions in our lives with our loved ones.  They play an important role to add structure to our social lives, and connect us with our families and backgrounds. They give us a distraction from our day to day, exhausting routine of life, and give us some inspiration to remember the important things and moments in life.  Festivals were started to pass the legends, knowledge and traditions onto the next generation.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

In my city, there is an animation festival, and during that, anybody can join to the festival.
>> In my city, there is an animation festival where everyone can join. 

My city is good at making animations so there are a lot of things about animations in my city.
>> My city is known for making good animations so there are a lot of it here. 

The most famous things about it are the museum about animation and our city's animation festival.
>> The most famous ones are in a museum and is being exhibited during the festivals. 

If we are able to make an animation and we want to join to the festival, then, anybody can join to the festival.
>> If we made an animation and want to join competitions during the festival, we can do that. 

And also in my city, there are a lot of festivals but the most famous festival in my city, is the animation festival.
>>And also in my city, there are a lot of festivals but the most famous one is the animation festival.

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