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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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How would you influence someone to take the COVID 19 vaccine if they hesitate to take it. Share your

작성자: 정*우
2021-08-25 369

회원님의 영작문



Please see the attached file.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi there Vicky! 


I am convinced by the statistics that you presented. If I could take another vaccine brand, I would get vaccinated as you bolstered your argument with statistics and concrete evidence of people who have taken the vaccine.


This however can be challenging to present to an ordinary person. In the media, they always say that the benefits of the vaccine outweigh the side effects. Of course not everyone will believe this but as of now,  if indeed the vaccine harms then a great portion of people have already died but that is not the case. Non-believers have the choice. You as a doctor may influence them more than anyone of us who know less about medicine.


Thank you for this answer and I shall see you in class for another discussion.


-T. Donna =)


The most common reason for hesitating to take COIVD 19 vaccine might be a risky side effects of vaccination, which are known to the general public by the media.

>> The most common reason for hesitating to take the COIVD 19 vaccine might be the risky side effects of the vaccination, which are known to the general public by the media.


 To persuade someone to take vaccination, I would start with relieving anxiety by suggesting the study results. The study published in The Lancet Infectious Diseases, used the data from 627383 users of the app, who self-reported systemic and local side effects. 

>>  To persuade someone to take the vaccination, I would start with relieving anxiety by suggesting the study results. The study published in The Lancet Infectious Diseases, used the data from 627383 users of the app, who self-reported systemic and local side effects. 


One in four people taken vaccines had mild systemic side effects (most common was headache (7.8%) following with muscle aches and fatigue) and local tenderness at the injection site(about 50%) The incidence of the side effects seems relatively high, but these are quite mild, and lasted no longer than 2 days.

>> One in four people who had taken vaccines had mild systemic side effects (most common was headache (7.8%) followed by muscle aches and fatigue), and local tenderness at the injection site(about 50%) The incidence of the side effects seem relatively high, but these are quite mild, and lasted no longer than 2 days.


 Moreover, Tim Spector's study showed that there was 58% reduction in infections 12 to 21 days after the first dose of Pfizer vaccine, 39% reduction after the AstraZeneca vaccine compared to controls. In conclusion, these results proved the effectiveness and the safety of the vaccination.

>>  Moreover, Tim Spector's study showed that there was a 58% reduction in infections 12 to 21 days after the first dose of Pfizer vaccine, 39% reduction after the AstraZeneca vaccine compared to controls. In conclusion, these results proved the effectiveness and the safety of the vaccination.


 Even though vaccinated person might experience side effects, these are not severe and self-limiting, but that person can be safe from COVID-19 virus, which might put one at risk for severe complications.

>>  Even though a vaccinated person might experience side effects, these are not severe and self-limiting, but that person can be safe from COVID-19 virus, which might put one at risk for severe complications.

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