무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

How would you influence someone to take the COVID 19 vaccine if they hesitate to take it. Share your

작성자: 정*우
2021-08-25 454

회원님의 영작문



Please see the attached file.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi there Vicky! 


I am convinced by the statistics that you presented. If I could take another vaccine brand, I would get vaccinated as you bolstered your argument with statistics and concrete evidence of people who have taken the vaccine.


This however can be challenging to present to an ordinary person. In the media, they always say that the benefits of the vaccine outweigh the side effects. Of course not everyone will believe this but as of now,  if indeed the vaccine harms then a great portion of people have already died but that is not the case. Non-believers have the choice. You as a doctor may influence them more than anyone of us who know less about medicine.


Thank you for this answer and I shall see you in class for another discussion.


-T. Donna =)


The most common reason for hesitating to take COIVD 19 vaccine might be a risky side effects of vaccination, which are known to the general public by the media.

>> The most common reason for hesitating to take the COIVD 19 vaccine might be the risky side effects of the vaccination, which are known to the general public by the media.


 To persuade someone to take vaccination, I would start with relieving anxiety by suggesting the study results. The study published in The Lancet Infectious Diseases, used the data from 627383 users of the app, who self-reported systemic and local side effects. 

>>  To persuade someone to take the vaccination, I would start with relieving anxiety by suggesting the study results. The study published in The Lancet Infectious Diseases, used the data from 627383 users of the app, who self-reported systemic and local side effects. 


One in four people taken vaccines had mild systemic side effects (most common was headache (7.8%) following with muscle aches and fatigue) and local tenderness at the injection site(about 50%) The incidence of the side effects seems relatively high, but these are quite mild, and lasted no longer than 2 days.

>> One in four people who had taken vaccines had mild systemic side effects (most common was headache (7.8%) followed by muscle aches and fatigue), and local tenderness at the injection site(about 50%) The incidence of the side effects seem relatively high, but these are quite mild, and lasted no longer than 2 days.


 Moreover, Tim Spector's study showed that there was 58% reduction in infections 12 to 21 days after the first dose of Pfizer vaccine, 39% reduction after the AstraZeneca vaccine compared to controls. In conclusion, these results proved the effectiveness and the safety of the vaccination.

>>  Moreover, Tim Spector's study showed that there was a 58% reduction in infections 12 to 21 days after the first dose of Pfizer vaccine, 39% reduction after the AstraZeneca vaccine compared to controls. In conclusion, these results proved the effectiveness and the safety of the vaccination.


 Even though vaccinated person might experience side effects, these are not severe and self-limiting, but that person can be safe from COVID-19 virus, which might put one at risk for severe complications.

>>  Even though a vaccinated person might experience side effects, these are not severe and self-limiting, but that person can be safe from COVID-19 virus, which might put one at risk for severe complications.

번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
109990 Is it better to rent or buy apartments nowadays? Give reasons... 김*연 완료 2021-07-13 2
109989 Homework 임*민 완료 2021-07-13 3
109988 homework 이*훈 완료 2021-07-13 0
109987 homework 이*훈 완료 2021-07-13 0
109986 homework 이*훈 완료 2021-07-13 0
109985 homework 이*훈 완료 2021-07-13 0
109984 Korea delays stronger COVID-19 countermeasures despite record... 유*진 완료 2021-07-13 1
109983 People nowadays tend to have children at older ages. Do the... 황*하 완료 2021-07-13 601
109982 Homework 양*진 완료 2021-07-13 1
109981 What are the most important things your parents taught you? 이*지 완료 2021-07-13 451
109980 home work on July 12 최*미 완료 2021-07-12 1
109979 Homework 이*지 완료 2021-07-12 568
109978 What part of English can be very difficult for you? 안*윤 완료 2021-07-12 1
109977 Homework (308) 박*하 완료 2021-07-12 434
109976 How can people develop good or healthy eating habits? 김*수 완료 2021-07-12 607
109975 How do you protect the environment in your own little ways. 박*경 완료 2021-07-12 527
109974 Homework 김*윤 완료 2021-07-12 562
109973 The best selling car in Korea 김*희 완료 2021-07-12 418
109972 homework 정*호 완료 2021-07-12 0
109971 homework 정*호 완료 2021-07-12 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]