¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK: Why is honesty important?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*¿¬
2021-08-25 347

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®



HOMEWORK(Claire)

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë


Hello Claire!

Good Job on your composition. See you tomorrow! ^^

 

Honesty is what humans must possess and one of the important elements that organize our society.

>>CORRECT

I will show why honesty is important through few examples.

>>I will show why honesty is important through a few examples.

Honesty is a duty that must be possessed as a matter of course.

>>Honesty is a duty that must be possessed as a matter of fact.

First, not being honest is as same as that person isn¡¯t ethical. For example, you were walking by the street and found a purse with money in it.

>>First, not being honest is as same as not being ethical. For example, you were walking by the street and found a purse with money in it.

If you are honest with yourself, you are going to give it back to the owner. But if you are not, maybe you are going to steal it.

>>CORRECT

This example shows the difference between honest people and people who are not and the connection between honesty and morality.

>>CORRECT

Accordingly, not being honest means that a person isn¡¯t living a moral life.

>>CORRECT

Second, deceiving can damage people.

>>CORRECT

Crimes like fraud give people economic damages.

>>CORRECT

There are lots of crimes that are related to deceiving somebody.

>>CORRECT

We can know that deceiving gives people many damages.

>>We can realize that deceiving people ruins people's lives.

I believe that honesty is a duty for people who are belonged to society.

>>I believe that honesty is a duty for people who belong in a  society.

Honesty is one of the elements that organize a good society. If members of society are not honest, our society will lose its credibility.

>>CORRECT

Even only one society member being not honest, other society members will collapse like dominoes.

>>Even if only one society member is being not honest, other society members will collapse like dominos.

Society is a system of organization of every people on Earth. Therefore even a single person be not honest, everyone will be influenced.

>>Society is an organized of every people on Earth. Therefore even if only a single person is not honest, everyone else will be influenced.

And that¡¯s why every single member of society is important. Also if we live an honest life, many crimes such as fraud will naturally be faded. These kinds of crimes are all related to honesty.

>>And that¡¯s why every single member of society is important. Also if we live an honest life, many crimes such as fraud will naturally disappear. These kinds of crimes are all related to honesty.

Following these reasons, being honest is one of the most important parts of making a convincing society. We can be honest with ourselves.

>>CORRECT

Many people try to fit others nowadays. But if we are honest with ourselves, we may respect not only our opinions and thought but others' thoughts too.

>>Many people try to fit in with others nowadays. But if we are honest with ourselves, we may respect not only our opinions and thought but others' thoughts too.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110213 Are you a spender or a saver? ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 238
110212 If you were an American, what do you think you could have been... ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 0
110211 Homework (310) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 173
110210 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 837
110209 Hi Kate! ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 4
110208 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 0
110207 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 303
110206 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 256
110205 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 1
110204 Internet, and Youtube ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 247
110203 homework ¹é*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 217
110202 A caffeine ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 3
110201 Being parents ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 271
110200 Page 39 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 303
110199 Monday homework ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 178
110198 Homework📝 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 187
110197 How do you control your anger? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 2
110196 The reason why °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 282
110195 Friday homework ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 242
110194 home work on July 21 ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-21 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04