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HOMEWORK: Why is honesty important?

작성자: 박*연
2021-08-25 387

회원님의 영작문



HOMEWORK(Claire)

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용


Hello Claire!

Good Job on your composition. See you tomorrow! ^^

 

Honesty is what humans must possess and one of the important elements that organize our society.

>>CORRECT

I will show why honesty is important through few examples.

>>I will show why honesty is important through a few examples.

Honesty is a duty that must be possessed as a matter of course.

>>Honesty is a duty that must be possessed as a matter of fact.

First, not being honest is as same as that person isn’t ethical. For example, you were walking by the street and found a purse with money in it.

>>First, not being honest is as same as not being ethical. For example, you were walking by the street and found a purse with money in it.

If you are honest with yourself, you are going to give it back to the owner. But if you are not, maybe you are going to steal it.

>>CORRECT

This example shows the difference between honest people and people who are not and the connection between honesty and morality.

>>CORRECT

Accordingly, not being honest means that a person isn’t living a moral life.

>>CORRECT

Second, deceiving can damage people.

>>CORRECT

Crimes like fraud give people economic damages.

>>CORRECT

There are lots of crimes that are related to deceiving somebody.

>>CORRECT

We can know that deceiving gives people many damages.

>>We can realize that deceiving people ruins people's lives.

I believe that honesty is a duty for people who are belonged to society.

>>I believe that honesty is a duty for people who belong in a  society.

Honesty is one of the elements that organize a good society. If members of society are not honest, our society will lose its credibility.

>>CORRECT

Even only one society member being not honest, other society members will collapse like dominoes.

>>Even if only one society member is being not honest, other society members will collapse like dominos.

Society is a system of organization of every people on Earth. Therefore even a single person be not honest, everyone will be influenced.

>>Society is an organized of every people on Earth. Therefore even if only a single person is not honest, everyone else will be influenced.

And that’s why every single member of society is important. Also if we live an honest life, many crimes such as fraud will naturally be faded. These kinds of crimes are all related to honesty.

>>And that’s why every single member of society is important. Also if we live an honest life, many crimes such as fraud will naturally disappear. These kinds of crimes are all related to honesty.

Following these reasons, being honest is one of the most important parts of making a convincing society. We can be honest with ourselves.

>>CORRECT

Many people try to fit others nowadays. But if we are honest with ourselves, we may respect not only our opinions and thought but others' thoughts too.

>>Many people try to fit in with others nowadays. But if we are honest with ourselves, we may respect not only our opinions and thought but others' thoughts too.

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