¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are the good things and bad things about living in South Korea?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÇÏ*À±
2021-08-27 329

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Coin karaokes are the advantage about living in South Korea. Because it make we can sing when we want to sing whenever. And it is cheap. The bad thing is we must have so many attentions. I don¡¯t know why people intervene other¡¯s job, but they do.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Yun! ^^

South Korea is such a good place. There are many beautiful sceneries there. Most of my students usually tell me how great living there is. I wish to visit there in the future.  Thanks for sharing. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Coin karaokes are the advantage about living in South Korea. 
>> Coin Karakokes are one of the great advantages in living in South Korea. 

Because it make we can sing when we want to sing whenever. 
>> We can sing whenever we want to. 

And it is cheap. 
>> It is also cheap. 

The bad thing is we must have so many attentions. 
>> One of the bad things is that people interfere with you all the time. 

I don¡¯t know why people intervene other¡¯s job, but they do.
>> I don¡¯t know why people intervene with other¡¯s job, but they still do.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109630 What do you need to prepare for? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 269
109629 If you retire in the future, what do you think would your life... ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 241
109628 Did you ever want to be a model? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 2
109627 Homework (304) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 283
109626 6/23 homework ³ª*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 240
109625 You have an urgent message to your manager, but he is talking to... À¯*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 1
109624 homework : essay À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 3
109623 \"Confidence is a form of beauty that no makeup could fake.\" ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 1
109622 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 249
109621 Enjoying the festival ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 226
109620 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 269
109619 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 327
109618 Who is the bigger hero? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 277
109617 homework : essay À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 6
109616 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 2
109615 The black cat ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 290
109614 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 249
109613 If you retire in the future, what do you think would your life... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 1
109612 What\'s the worst food you ever ate in a restaurant? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 1
109611 If you retire in the future, what do you think would your life... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 285

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04