¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Monday homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2021-08-30 192

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q:Most people say the book is better than the movie. Is this true for you?
A:I think it is true for me.
Actually, movie has video and audio so most of people think that movie is better but if people watch movie for long time, then their eyes can be not good and it can be more like real so it can make people change, but even if people read books, their eyes are the same and most of books don't make people change.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


I think it is true for me.

>> CORRECT!
Actually, movie has video and audio so most of people think that movie is better 

>> Actually, a movie has a video and audio so most people think that a movie is better.

but if people watch movie for long time, then their eyes can be not good and it can be more like real so it can make people change, 

>> But if people watch a movie for a long time, then it won't be good for their eyes and the movie can be realistic so it can make people change, 

but even if people read books, their eyes are the same and most of books don't make people change.

>> If people read books, their eyes will stay in the same condition and most books will not make people change.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111330 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 3
111329 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 222
111328 This, that, these, or those ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 2
111327 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 4
111326 Is it possible to avoid conflicts totally in our life? Why or... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 1
111325 20th homework Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 1
111324 Public remains poles aprt over accepting Afghan refugees À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 1
111323 homework »ç* ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 0
111322 What would you say are your biggest air travel pet peeves? ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 316
111321 Some believe children should be taught to give speeches and... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 605
111320 Most people say the book is better than the movie. Is this true... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 1
111319 If you had 3 wishes, what would it be and why? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 239
111318 My mom\'s favorite flower ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 259
111317 Which country do you \"NOT WISH\" to visit? È«*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 256
111316 What country would you want to be a million miles away from... ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 5
111315 What makes someone beautiful. ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 274
111314 In the future, I need to learn more about expressions that are... ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 236
111313 Homework(*0v0*) Á¤*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-26 216
111312 Everyone in the family looks great, right? ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-08-26 267
111311 8.26 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-26 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04