¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What health problems can some gadgets cause?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼ö
2021-09-03 438

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think the worst problem is not to sleep at night because of gadgets especially cell phone. Due to the electromagnetic waves people cannot sleep well at night and hard to get up early. I think it interferes our daily lives and people would live harder than when they do not use their cell phones before they sleep. It has impact on body because they cannot sleep well and take a rest. I think gadgets affect health of people as much as they guess.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Ria!

Thank you for answering your homework.  This is a good way to help you improve your English skills.  I hope to see again soon.  ^^


-T. Maine


I think the worst problem is not to sleep at night because of gadgets especially cell phone.

>>I think the worst problem is not sleeping at night because of gadgets especially the use of cellphones.

Due to the electromagnetic waves people cannot sleep well at night and hard to get up early.

>>Due to the electromagnetic waves, people cannot sleep well at night and hardly get up early in the morning.

I think it interferes our daily lives and people would live harder than when they do not use their cell phones before they sleep.

>>Correct.

It has impact on body because they cannot sleep well and take a rest.

>>It has an impact on the body because people cannot sleep soundly and take a rest comfortably.

I think gadgets affect health of people as much as they guess.

>>I think gadgets affect the health of people as much as they do.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111131 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 2
111130 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 1
111129 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 2
111128 What do the different colors mean in your culture? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 0
111127 16th homework Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 3
111126 absent from class ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 313
111125 my advantage ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 393
111124 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 2
111123 Who is taller ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 392
111122 21/08/18 ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 324
111121 Seoul education chief hints at allowing more in-person classes À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 1
111120 Link for class contents ¼Û*ö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 331
111119 The Death Toll In Denali Increases, Which Happens Normal... È«*Çý ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 411
111118 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 302
111117 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 2
111116 will\'s offer À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 3
111115 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 3
111114 adventure things Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 292
111113 What do you do when something or someone tries to annoy you? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 481
111112 Homework(*^O^*) Á¤*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-23 294

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04