¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

In most of the countries, people prefer to live in a rented apartment rather than buying a home? Wha

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-09-06 461

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It sounds weird for Korean because most people dream to buy their own house. People are sick and tired of moving out when their contract end and owners ask tenants to pay more rental fee. Tenants can't change structure without owner's permission even they need to make a hole for installing air conditioner and It is impossible to remodel their rooms as well. In addition, people have to spend quite huge money for transportation fees, agent commission fees and taxes whenever they move out. However, there are many advantages living in rented house. People don't have to worry about the house prices which are extremely expensive. It might be impossible for newlyweds to prepare. It can be the chances to save money while they are living rented house and will get opportunity to buy their own house. Tenants don't have to care of facility.defects and maintenance because it's owner's responsibility. To sum up, there are many advantages living in rental house, I prefer to purchase my own house.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Mr. Hwang! Today is....... MY BIRTHDAY! Where is my present??? kkkk kidding!!! Anyway, thanks for your ideas on your essays. Keep writing and improve your written English. I think you're better in writing than in speaking. kkkk kidding again! Have a nice day! See you tomorrow!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
It sounds weird for Korean because most people dream to buy their own house.
>>> It sounds weird for Korean because most people dreamt of buying their own house.
 People are sick and tired of moving out when their contract end and owners ask tenants to pay more rental fees.
>>> CORRECT
 Tenants can't change structure without owner's permission even they need to make a hole for installing air conditioner and It is impossible to remodel their rooms as well. 
>>>  Tenants can't change the room's structure without the owner's permission even if they need to make a hole for installing air conditioner and it is impossible to remodel their rooms as well. 
In addition, people have to spend quite huge money for transportation fees, agent commission fees and taxes whenever they move out.
>>> CORRECT
 However, there are many advantages living in rented house.
>>> CORRECT
 People don't have to worry about the house prices which are extremely expensive.
>>> CORRECT
 It might be impossible for newlyweds to prepare. 
>>> CORRECT
It can be the chances to save money while they are living rented house and will get opportunity to buy their own house.
>>> It can be a chance to save money while they are living in a rented house and will have an opportunity to buy their own house.
 Tenants don't have to care of facility.defects and maintenance because it's owner's responsibility. 
>>>  Tenants don't have to mind about facilities' defects and maintenance because it's the owner's responsibility. 
To sum up, there are many advantages living in rental house, I prefer to purchase my own house.
>>> To sum up, there are many advantages living in rental house however, I prefer to purchase my own house.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110044 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 510
110043 It\'s so difficult to solve all of this...^^;; ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 445
110042 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 472
110041 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 499
110040 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 517
110039 Where do you want to travel in future and why? ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 689
110038 Verses Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 471
110037 Why do you think is it harder for old people to accept change? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 371
110036 A hot day ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 2
110035 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 675
110034 Homework ¾ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 0
110033 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 430
110032 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 624
110031 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 628
110030 Does everyone have equal job opportunities in your country? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 585
110029 What other letter sounds do you have difficulty with? ÃÖ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 672
110028 Is junk food good for your health? Why? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 679
110027 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 4
110026 Do you think you will live until a ripe old age? Why or why not? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 1
110025 Why do some people like to spread rumors? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04