¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Some countries are considering imposing curfews in which teenagers will not be allowed outdoors at n

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-09-07 177

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The night curfew had been in place between September 1945 and January 1982 in Korea. When it was enforced, all citizens were ordered to stay indoors from midnight until 4 a.m. Although, it is not exactly same as juvenile curfew, it is proved that curfews weren't effective to reduce crime rate. Children have to be protected by country and parents but curfews aren't the right way to keep them safe. If the main purpose is keep children away from the criminals, it create more serious crime because juvenile tends to act exactly opposite way what adults want to. Most of them may try to find the way to go out and then do accidentally such as driving car, having drug, and doing illegal things. Furthermore, it is the waste of police resources. Police officers are forced to monitor, arrest, and process curfew violations, they are unable to direct their energies to dealing with actually dangerous behavior. This leads to victims who might be able to save from the crime. To sum up, I don't agree

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

LOVELY DAY TO YOU MR. HWANG! ^^
Each and every day is a beautiful gift from God to humanity, and I pray that every good thing that life has got to offer today, will never pass you by. 
It¡¯s hope God will give you the grace, courage and strength to always make the best of each and every day. Have a great time~! ^^
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
The night curfew had been in place between September 1945 and January 1982 in Korea.
>>> CORRECT
 When it was enforced, all citizens were ordered to stay indoors from midnight until 4 a.m. 
>>> CORRECT
Although, it is not exactly same as juvenile curfew, it is proved that curfews weren't effective to reduce crime rate.
>>> Although, it is not exactly the same as juvenile curfew, it proves that curfews weren't effective to reduce crime rate.
 Children have to be protected by country and parents but curfews aren't the right way to keep them safe
>>>  Children have to be protected by the country and their parents but curfews aren't the right way to keep them safe.
 If the main purpose is keep children away from the criminals, it create more serious crime because juvenile tends to act exactly opposite way what adults want to. 
>>>  If the main purpose is to keep children away from criminals, it create more serious crime because juvenile tends to act exactly opposite the way what adults want. 
Most of them may try to find the way to go out and then do accidentally such as driving car, having drug, and doing illegal things. 
>>> CORRECT
Furthermore, it a waste for police resources.
>>> CORRECT
Police officers are forced to monitor, arrest, and process curfew violations, they are unable to direct their energies to dealing with actual dangerous behavior. 
>>> CORRECT
This leads to victims who might be able to save from the crime. 
>>> CORRECT
To sum up, I don't agree...
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111442 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 200
111441 What do you think is going to happen in your life next year? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 189
111440 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 184
111439 friend ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 192
111438 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 244
111437 22th homework Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 2
111436 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 1
111435 Senses ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 185
111434 On ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 1
111433 page 17 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 197
111432 How do you think other people see you when you make a mistake? ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 1
111431 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 2
111430 Is it morally right to spend a lot of money on pets, rather than... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 0
111429 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 2
111428 What comes to mind when you hear the word \'refugee\'? °í*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 2
111427 Do you have any tips for making air travel more enjoyable? ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 214
111426 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 1
111425 Describe your favorite city in South Korea ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 204
111424 If you were the boss of your own clinic, what amenity or benefit... Á¤*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 175
111423 Homework ¾ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-31 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04