¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Who, besides your parents, had the biggest impact on your childhood?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-09-07 201

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think my brother gave me the biggest impact on my chilhood besides my parents.
I was able to grow my social ability more faster and I think I had a lot of great time with my brother.
I learned how to thank to other people and how to apolosize to other people.
That's why I think my brother gave me the biggest impact on my chilhood besides my parents.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! ^^
 
There are certain people in our lives that has made a great impact in our lives. Most of them come from our childhood. We wouldn't be who we are today without their help. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I think my brother gave me the biggest impact on my chilhood besides my parents.
>>I think my brother has the biggest impact on my childhood besides my parents.

I was able to grow my social ability more faster and I think I had a lot of great time with my brother.
>> I was able to grow my social skills faster and I think I had a lot of great time with my brother.

I learned how to thank to other people and how to apolosize to other people.
>> I learned how to thank other people and how to apologize as well. 

That's why I think my brother gave me the biggest impact on my chilhood besides my parents.
>> That's why I think my brother had the biggest impact on my childhood besides my parents.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111402 Pet Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 189
111401 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 188
111400 pickled ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111399 If you can eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 157
111398 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 199
111397 What\'s your take on the suppression of women in Afghanistan Çã*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111396 Which do you prefer for your garden organic or chemical... ye*nhi ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 2
111395 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111394 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111393 Tips on the making air travel more enjoyable. Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 198
111392 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 182
111391 About Your Wardrobe ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 160
111390 What is my best experience in Boracay? ±è*¹¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111389 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 188
111388 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 185
111387 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111386 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 2
111385 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 2
111384 Homework😀 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 199
111383 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 196

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04