무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Please compare the healthcare system of America and South Korea.

작성자: 류*선
2021-09-08 318

회원님의 영작문

It different a lot of healthcare system of America and South Korea. I must make an appointment before I go to the hospital in the USA. Also, the operating healthcare system is very slow. I had experienced that when I became pregnant, I couldn't eat anything. I needed to get IV. However, American hospitals usually don't give IV to their patients easily. It was a very painful time for me. Finally, I was miscarriage and I lost heath. They just wanted to follow their rules. I've seen a lot of people who don't have access to their health care system. I saw people waiting for death because they didn't have money to get medical support.

On the other hand, In the South Korea, the healthcare system is faster than in the USA. In addition, it's important price isn't expensive. Furthermore, I could get cured right away without an appointment. It is very convenient. So, when I visit South Korea, I never forget to visit various hospitals for healthcare. I miss Korean healthcare system.

Thanks!:)

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good evening, Jane! I am so sorry to hear about your terrible experience in America. I thought America offers the best healthcare service, but it's not what I expected. I hope you and your family are always safe and in shape!-Faith-
It different a lot of healthcare system of America and South Korea. 
>> The healthcare system of America and South Korea is a lot different. 
I must make an appointment before I go to the hospital in the USA. 
>> CORRECT
Also, the operating healthcare system is very slow. 
>> Also, their healthcare service is very slow. 
I had experienced that when I became pregnant, I couldn't eat anything. I needed to get IV. 
>> I had experienced that when I became pregnant, I couldn't eat anything so I needed to get an IV. 
However, American hospitals usually don't give IV to their patients easily. 
>> However, American hospitals usually don't give an IV to their patients easily. 
It was a very painful time for me. 
>> CORRECT
OR It was devastating for me.
Finally, I was miscarriage and I lost heath. 
>> Unfortunately, I had a miscarriage and my health deteriorates. 
They just wanted to follow their rules. 
>> Sadly, they just wanted to follow their rules. 
I've seen a lot of people who don't have access to their health care system. 
>> CORRECT
I saw people waiting for death because they didn't have money to get medical support.
>> I saw some people waiting for their death because they didn't have money to get medical support.
On the other hand, In the South Korea, the healthcare system is faster than in the USA. 
>> On the other hand, in South Korea, the healthcare system is faster than in the USA. 
In addition, it's important price isn't expensive. 
>> In addition, it's important that the hospital fee isn't high. 
Furthermore, I could get cured right away without an appointment. 
>> CORRECT
OR Moreover, they accept walk-in patients.
It is very convenient. 
>> CORRECT
So, when I visit South Korea, I never forget to visit various hospitals for healthcare. 
>> So, when I visit South Korea, I never forget to visit various hospitals for my healthcare. 
I miss Korean healthcare system.
>> I miss the Korean healthcare system.
Thanks!:)
>> CORRECT
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
112780 Writing 안*진 완료 2021-10-12 1
112779 homework 심*상 완료 2021-10-12 384
112778 homework 권*미 완료 2021-10-12 3
112777 Ideal job. 민*정 완료 2021-10-12 1
112776 What do you think is the hardest part about being a student?... 류*주 완료 2021-10-12 362
112775 Tuesday Homework 류*우 완료 2021-10-12 324
112774 Essay 이*경 완료 2021-10-12 315
112773 home work 김*우 완료 2021-10-12 349
112772 How did you spend your long weekend? 김*연 완료 2021-10-12 0
112771 Cartoons 기*현 완료 2021-10-12 302
112770 e-mail correction 박*광 완료 2021-10-12 1
112769 Homework 함*주 완료 2021-10-12 1
112768 Please make a sentence with these expressions: 류*선 완료 2021-10-12 339
112767 What are the things you are good at? 주*석 완료 2021-10-12 0
112766 wild fire 윤*진 완료 2021-10-12 2
112765 Young adult\'s most hardest thing 이*은 완료 2021-10-12 338
112764 Why I don\'t be a heavier 김*성 완료 2021-10-12 286
112763 HOMEWORK 신*아 완료 2021-10-12 3
112762 If you were a song, what song would you be and why? 류*연 완료 2021-10-12 368
112761 How many languages do you want to speak fluently? Why? 송*진 완료 2021-10-11 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]