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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What movie moved you and why? Answer in a short paragraph.

작성자: 정*우
2021-09-08 454

회원님의 영작문

One of my favorite movies, which especially moved me was "About time". The main character of this movie has an ability to time travel. His ability runs in his family. Using this ability, whenever he ruin any work, he go back in the time and solve the problem. With his ability, he could make a perfect date with his lover and help his neighbor's work success. At the last part of the movie, the main character try to live ordinary days again using his ability. He lived those days again almost exactly the same way, then he could notice how sweet the world can be, which he could not see before because of the tension and the stress. The main message that this movie gave to me was that if we live our lives with a time and try to look around, our world can be much sweeter and happier. Since we cannot time travel, we can spend the moments only once. Even though some days may be hard, I will try not to miss small valuable moments and spend a valuable time myself.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi there again Vicky!

Today, so may scholars still want to bend time and travel in the future or in the past and yet they never yielded. Man always had a wishful thinking of correcting his mistakes if he can go back in time or take advantage of the events in the future. But then, seeing the past nor the future have recursive impacts as today will never be the same again.

Seizing moments by living life joyfully with no regrets make us never wonder of the past or the future. We need to live our lives everyday so we can look forward to see a better future and we can look back to a happy past.

So enjoy your remaining days in Jeju. It may be challenging yet it's your choice to make it meaningful. It only happens once in your life.

Catch you later.

-T. Donna =)

One of my favorite movies, which especially moved me was "About time". The main character of this movie has an ability to time travel. 
>> Correct!
Or: One of my favorite movies which especially moved me was "About Time". 

His ability runs in his family. Using this ability, whenever he ruin any work, he go back in the time and solve the problem. With his ability, he could make a perfect date with his lover and help his neighbor's work success.
>>  His ability runs in his family. Using this ability, whenever he ruins any work, he goes back in the time and solves the problem. With his ability, he could make a perfect date with his lover and help his neighbor's work successful.

At the last part of the movie, the main character try to live ordinary days again using his ability. He lived those days again almost exactly the same way, then he could notice how sweet the world can be, which he could not see before because of the tension and the stress. 
>> Correct!
Or: ...the main character tried to live ordinary days...

The main message that this movie gave to me was that if we live our lives with a time and try to look around, our world can be much sweeter and happier. 
>> The main message that this movie gave me was that if we live our lives with time and try to look around, our world can be much sweeter and happier. 

Since we cannot time travel, we can spend the moments only once. Even though some days may be hard, I will try not to miss small valuable moments and spend a valuable time myself.
>> Correct!
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교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

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전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
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04

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