¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why people are upset?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¶û
2021-09-08 231

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®



There are many reasons why people get angry. I'm going to talk about just two of them, focusing on what I've been through!

1. When you are concentrating hard,but they are talking loudly next to you
For example...
A: I have to work really hard today! I will never let my parents down!
B,C,D: Really?? How can you do that?? Absolutely!! 'he's so awesome... Oh my God... A! Would you like to take a look at this?? It's so fun!!!
A: Guys...I'm sorry, but please be quiet...I'm concentrating now...
B,C,D: ...Hey..Can't we talk about it during rest time? Isn't it your fault that you're still studying during your break?? Don't annoy me...

2. When talking loudly in public
For example, in subway
A: "Ah!! Is that so?? Oh my gosh~~~ Did you?? God, that people can be that kind... Thank you, really... Thank you~~~ Oh, here?? It's not in a public place~ ~ ho ho ho"
B,C,D: "Why are she like that.. It's not a public place..? She's crazy..", "She wants to advertise his private life loudly like that..."

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Maria!
^_^)
It's so fun to read your composition. You can be a scriptwriter. :)
However, I had to reorganize your sentences, so it would make more sense. It would really look like a conversation.
We can talk about this in class. See you then!^^

__Teacher Mayleen :)


There are many reasons why people get angry.
>>> CORRECT
I'm going to talk about just two of them, focusing on what I've been through!
>>> CORRECT
>>> OR: I will mention two reasons which I have personally experienced.

1. When you are concentrating hard,but they are talking loudly next to you
>>> You get angry when you are concentration on something, but the people next to you are talking loudly.
For example...
A: I have to work really hard today! I will never let my parents down!
>>> CORRECT
B,C,D: Really?? How can you do that?? Absolutely!! 'he's so awesome... Oh my God... A! Would you like to take a look at this?? It's so fun!!!
B: Really?! How can you do that?
C: Absolutely! He's so awesome.
D: Oh my God! Would you like to take a loot at his? It's so fun!
A: Guys...I'm sorry, but please be quiet...I'm concentrating now...
>>> Guys, I'm sorry, but please be quiet. I'm concentrating now.
B,C,D: ...Hey..Can't we talk about it during rest time? 
Isn't it your fault that you're still studying during your break?? Don't annoy me...
B: Hey! Can't we talk about it during our breaktime?
C: Isn't it your fault that you're still studying during your break?
D: Don't annoy me.

2. When talking loudly in public
>>> You get angry when people are so loud in public places.
For example, in subway
>>> Let's take for example when you're on the subway.
A: "Ah!! Is that so?? Oh my gosh~~~ Did you?? God, that people can be that kind... Thank you, really... Thank you~~~ Oh, here?? It's not in a public place~ ~ ho ho ho"
>>> Ah! Is that so? My gosh! God, I didn't know people can be that kind. Thank you so much! Oh, now? No, this isn't a public place.
B,C,D: "Why are she like that.. It's not a public place..? She's crazy..", "She wants to advertise his private life loudly like that..."
B: Why is she like that?
C: It's not a public place? She's crazy!
D: She wants to advertise her private life like that.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111415 i\'m tired.................. ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 248
111414 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 229
111413 library of the future ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 261
111412 Do you want your children to have their own cars at this point... ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 227
111411 The hardest job: house wife ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 268
111410 21 homework Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 2
111409 8.30 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111408 Homework ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 6
111407 HOMEWORK: Do you think it\'s disrespectful to argue with your... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 263
111406 ielts task 2 ÀÌ*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 225
111405 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 234
111404 Writing task: How does the government in your country help... Á¶*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 4
111403 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 240
111402 Pet Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 227
111401 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 221
111400 pickled ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111399 If you can eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 235
111398 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 272
111397 What\'s your take on the suppression of women in Afghanistan Çã*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111396 Which do you prefer for your garden organic or chemical... ye*nhi ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04