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Why people are upset?

작성자: 김*랑
2021-09-08 338

회원님의 영작문



There are many reasons why people get angry. I'm going to talk about just two of them, focusing on what I've been through!

1. When you are concentrating hard,but they are talking loudly next to you
For example...
A: I have to work really hard today! I will never let my parents down!
B,C,D: Really?? How can you do that?? Absolutely!! 'he's so awesome... Oh my God... A! Would you like to take a look at this?? It's so fun!!!
A: Guys...I'm sorry, but please be quiet...I'm concentrating now...
B,C,D: ...Hey..Can't we talk about it during rest time? Isn't it your fault that you're still studying during your break?? Don't annoy me...

2. When talking loudly in public
For example, in subway
A: "Ah!! Is that so?? Oh my gosh~~~ Did you?? God, that people can be that kind... Thank you, really... Thank you~~~ Oh, here?? It's not in a public place~ ~ ho ho ho"
B,C,D: "Why are she like that.. It's not a public place..? She's crazy..", "She wants to advertise his private life loudly like that..."

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi there, Maria!
^_^)
It's so fun to read your composition. You can be a scriptwriter. :)
However, I had to reorganize your sentences, so it would make more sense. It would really look like a conversation.
We can talk about this in class. See you then!^^

__Teacher Mayleen :)


There are many reasons why people get angry.
>>> CORRECT
I'm going to talk about just two of them, focusing on what I've been through!
>>> CORRECT
>>> OR: I will mention two reasons which I have personally experienced.

1. When you are concentrating hard,but they are talking loudly next to you
>>> You get angry when you are concentration on something, but the people next to you are talking loudly.
For example...
A: I have to work really hard today! I will never let my parents down!
>>> CORRECT
B,C,D: Really?? How can you do that?? Absolutely!! 'he's so awesome... Oh my God... A! Would you like to take a look at this?? It's so fun!!!
B: Really?! How can you do that?
C: Absolutely! He's so awesome.
D: Oh my God! Would you like to take a loot at his? It's so fun!
A: Guys...I'm sorry, but please be quiet...I'm concentrating now...
>>> Guys, I'm sorry, but please be quiet. I'm concentrating now.
B,C,D: ...Hey..Can't we talk about it during rest time? Isn't it your fault that you're still studying during your break?? Don't annoy me...
B: Hey! Can't we talk about it during our breaktime?
C: Isn't it your fault that you're still studying during your break?
D: Don't annoy me.

2. When talking loudly in public
>>> You get angry when people are so loud in public places.
For example, in subway
>>> Let's take for example when you're on the subway.
A: "Ah!! Is that so?? Oh my gosh~~~ Did you?? God, that people can be that kind... Thank you, really... Thank you~~~ Oh, here?? It's not in a public place~ ~ ho ho ho"
>>> Ah! Is that so? My gosh! God, I didn't know people can be that kind. Thank you so much! Oh, now? No, this isn't a public place.
B,C,D: "Why are she like that.. It's not a public place..? She's crazy..", "She wants to advertise his private life loudly like that..."
B: Why is she like that?
C: It's not a public place? She's crazy!
D: She wants to advertise her private life like that.
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