¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Monday homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2021-09-13 228

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q:What makes someone beautiful in your country?
A:I think being good to other people or being kind makes someone beautiful.
Actually, I'm not sure about it because I don't care about it, but I think good people or kind people would look beautiful.
Also, even if people look beautiful, their mind can not be good so, people need to know their mind not their exterior.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


I think being good to other people or being kind makes someone beautiful.

>> CORRECT!
Actually, I'm not sure about it because I don't care about it, but I think good people or kind people would look beautiful.

>> Actually, I'm not sure about it because I don't care much about it, but I think good or kind people look beautiful.
Also, even if people look beautiful, their mind can not be good so, people need to know their mind not their exterior.

>> Also, even if people look beautiful but their mind is not, they need to focus more on their thoughts and not their exterior.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112069 It will be really really... ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 247
112068 Popcorn, movie theaters, Marvel, and night ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 258
112067 How do you handle stress? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 304
112066 9.16 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 0
112065 why kids will read books ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 234
112064 Which one do you think is better, being a boss or being a... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 4
112063 How do you balance between your work and personal life? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 225
112062 Which of your friends or family posts the most entertaining... ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 228
112061 Are you concept-oriented or task-oriented? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 415
112060 Are you truthful most of the time? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 686
112059 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 259
112058 The question ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 1
112057 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 257
112056 Take pictures and run away ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 214
112055 HOMEWORK FOR 09.16 ye*nhi ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 1
112054 Homework~~~~~~~~~!!!!! ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 203
112053 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 1
112052 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 932
112051 page 4 and 8 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 228
112050 Do gender issues affect the development of a country? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-16 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04