¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: °­*¿ì
2021-09-17 288

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think it is spending time with my family and have a good time. It is important to have a lot of time with close people.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Kane! :)

Long weekends are the perfect opportunity to get out and about. So, to spend them in front of the television would be almost criminal.The key here is balance. You certainly don¡¯t have to plan each moment of the long weekend. But making time for a few activities can leave you recharged and happier once the holiday has passed.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I think it is spending time with my family and have a good time. 
>> I think it is spending time with my family and having a good time. 

It is important to have a lot of time with close people.
>> It is important to have a lot of time with people we are close with. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112307 What is the worst news you have ever heard of or read about? ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 780
112306 LGBTQ ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 270
112305 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 251
112304 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 203
112303 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 1
112302 Today\'s homework Ȳ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 2
112301 °úÁ¦ Æí*ö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 305
112300 Do you like new things? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 1
112299 What have you saved these days? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 744
112298 Holidays ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 352
112297 When is the best time for you to spend time with your family and... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-29 3
112296 Sleep...zzz ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-09-28 296
112295 How different do you think is the generation now from the... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-28 308
112294 What are the purposes of National certificates? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-28 3
112293 What are your expectations when you go back to China? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-28 1
112292 Read books. ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-28 575
112291 What would you like to change/improve in yourself? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-28 353
112290 Writing: How do you feel when you can\'t reach someone\'s phone... À¯*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-09-28 590
112289 page 32 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-09-28 308
112288 Korean imaginary creature: HATAE ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-28 608

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04