¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

20210924

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¶*Çý
2021-09-24 441

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

There are some very good advantages about riding motorcycle and very extremely bad disadvantages as well. First of all, I'd like to say that it was a brilliant idea that I decided to learn how to ride motorcycle. Most of all, it is really fun. Not sitting inside a car, but sitting right on the top of your engine of the vehicle, feeling the air directly is really different from what you can feel inside a car. It really helps to heal myself from daily stress and to feel more happiness. And as I live in a city, it's much more convenient riding a motorcycle than a car especially in rush hour. Because it always has some space to get through. I'm also very glad that I learned motorcycle when I was grown up enough at 34 yrs old. It's when we can be more cautious and careful than when we were in our 20s. I saw some teanagers and young people get serious accident mostly because they didn't watch out more carefully or didn't slow down when they had to. Fun but dangerous at the same time.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

There are some very good advantages about riding motorcycle and very extremely bad disadvantages as well. 
>> There are some advantages as well as disadvantages of riding a motorcycle. 

First of all, I'd like to say that it was a brilliant idea that I decided to learn how to ride motorcycle. 
>> First of all, I'd like to say that it was a brilliant idea that I decided to learn how to ride a motorcycle. 

Most of all, it is really fun. 
>> It is really fun.

Not sitting inside a car, but sitting right on the top of your engine of the vehicle, feeling the air directly is really different from what you can feel inside a car. 
>> Not sitting inside a car, but sitting right on top of your vehicle, feeling the air directly, is really different from what you can feel inside a car. 

It really helps to heal myself from daily stress and to feel more happiness.
>> It really helps to relieve my stress and to feel more happiness.

 And as I live in a city, it's much more convenient riding a motorcycle than a car especially in rush hour. 
>>  This is a good sentence.

Because it always has some space to get through.
>> It is because it always has some space to pass through.

 I'm also very glad that I learned motorcycle when I was grown up enough at 34 yrs old. 
>>  I was also very glad that I learned to ride a motorcycle when I was old enough. I was 34 years old. 

It's when we can be more cautious and careful than when we were in our 20s. 
>> It's when we can be more cautious and more careful than when we were in our 20s. 

I saw some teanagers and young people get serious accident mostly because they didn't watch out more carefully or didn't slow down when they had to.
>> I saw some teenagers and other young people who got into serious accidents mostly because they weren't careful or didn't slow down when they had to.

 Fun but dangerous at the same time.
>> Riding a motorcycle is fun but dangerous at the same time.


Hi, Min! Thank you for doing your homework.   Just please observe proper word usage next time. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110936 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-08-17 2
110935 What do you think about a Dutch treat? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-17 1
110934 The special exhibition of the Hero ¡°Hong Bum-Do¡± in Bongoh... È«*Çý ¿Ï·á 2021-08-17 3
110933 Fall ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-17 556
110932 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-17 3
110931 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-17 3
110930 homework À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-17 5
110929 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-17 2
110928 I enjoyed to learn an english Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-17 454
110927 My favorite place is... ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-17 7
110926 Do you agree with the idea of less consideration about the... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-16 2
110925 If it was your birthday, what gift do you want to receive and... ÁÖ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-16 381
110924 What is the most useful thing that you own and why? ÁÖ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-16 334
110923 What kind of device should be invented in order for our lives to... ÁÖ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-16 372
110922 Do you think going to different academies is important for... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-16 470
110921 Writing task: Are there any values that your parents tried to... Á¶*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-16 2
110920 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-08-16 0
110919 Fila and Nike is so Pretty!!! ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-08-16 433
110918 Homework °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-16 401
110917 What is your idea of a perfect vacation? Kindly explain it. ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-16 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04