¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think it is more important to make a lot of money or to enjoy your job?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¿ì
2021-09-30 225

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When we choose the job, we consider various aspects. Even though the salary is one of the most important aspects to consider, it is much more important to choose a job I can enjoy.
Since people ordinarily keep their job for a long time, choosing a job which dose not interest them at all or distress them is a foolish choice which make one's life boring and hard. If we only focus on the salary when choosing the job, the motivation for us to work is only money, thus we might not feel enough accomplishment and the possibility to quit the job is high.

There are also several points which enable one to enjoy their job. We can easily think of the interest on the field or aptitude, but work-like balance or working environment is also important elements for enjoying the job. In conclusion, I want every student to remind those things seriously when considering their job and satisfy at their job.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Vicky!

Wow! I really agree with you. You actually have a point there. It's really best to think carefully before choosing the career path that we want to take part in the future because it will greatly affect our every aspect in life.

Thank you for sharing. It's indeed a pretty good answer.

~T. Roanne ^_^

========================================================
Corrections and Suggestions:

When we choose the job, we consider various aspects. 
>> Correct! 
Even though the salary is one of the most important aspects to consider, it is much more important to choose a job I can enjoy.
>> Correct! 
Since people ordinarily keep their job for a long time, choosing a job which dose not interest them at all or distress them is a foolish choice which make one's life boring and hard. 
>>Since people ordinarily keep their job for a long time, choosing a job which does not interest them at all or distress them is a foolish choice which makes one's life boring and hard.
If we only focus on the salary when choosing the job, the motivation for us to work is only money, thus we might not feel enough accomplishment and the possibility to quit the job is high.
>> Correct! 
There are also several points which enable one to enjoy their job.
>> Correct! 
We can easily think of the interest on the field or aptitude, but work-like balance or working environment is also important elements for enjoying the job. 
>> We can easily think of the interest in the field or aptitude, but work-like balance or working environment is also important elements for enjoying the job.
In conclusion, I want every student to remind those things seriously when considering their job and satisfy at their job.
>> In conclusion, I want every student to remember those things seriously when considering their job and satisfy at their job.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112249 [Autumn Season, Family Photo Festival] ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 236
112248 9.27 homework ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 2
112247 What was the most enjoyable thing that you did during your... Á¤*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 232
112246 9.27 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 0
112245 Life without siblings ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 225
112244 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 229
112243 When you were a child, what did you want to grow up to be?... °¥*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 269
112242 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 228
112241 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 239
112240 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 212
112239 away from ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 1
112238 HOMEWORK: What would you do if you were trapped in an island? ¼Õ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 1
112237 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 201
112236 Describe a time when you had to assist a co-worker. ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 219
112235 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 168
112234 Homework {09/27} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 207
112233 Since we celebrated Chu Seok, what are you most thankful for? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 262
112232 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 480
112231 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 645
112230 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-27 183

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04