¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think it is more important to make a lot of money or to enjoy your job?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¿ì
2021-09-30 525

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When we choose the job, we consider various aspects. Even though the salary is one of the most important aspects to consider, it is much more important to choose a job I can enjoy.
Since people ordinarily keep their job for a long time, choosing a job which dose not interest them at all or distress them is a foolish choice which make one's life boring and hard. If we only focus on the salary when choosing the job, the motivation for us to work is only money, thus we might not feel enough accomplishment and the possibility to quit the job is high.

There are also several points which enable one to enjoy their job. We can easily think of the interest on the field or aptitude, but work-like balance or working environment is also important elements for enjoying the job. In conclusion, I want every student to remind those things seriously when considering their job and satisfy at their job.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Vicky!

Wow! I really agree with you. You actually have a point there. It's really best to think carefully before choosing the career path that we want to take part in the future because it will greatly affect our every aspect in life.

Thank you for sharing. It's indeed a pretty good answer.

~T. Roanne ^_^

========================================================
Corrections and Suggestions:

When we choose the job, we consider various aspects. 
>> Correct! 
Even though the salary is one of the most important aspects to consider, it is much more important to choose a job I can enjoy.
>> Correct! 
Since people ordinarily keep their job for a long time, choosing a job which dose not interest them at all or distress them is a foolish choice which make one's life boring and hard. 
>>Since people ordinarily keep their job for a long time, choosing a job which does not interest them at all or distress them is a foolish choice which makes one's life boring and hard.
If we only focus on the salary when choosing the job, the motivation for us to work is only money, thus we might not feel enough accomplishment and the possibility to quit the job is high.
>> Correct! 
There are also several points which enable one to enjoy their job.
>> Correct! 
We can easily think of the interest on the field or aptitude, but work-like balance or working environment is also important elements for enjoying the job. 
>> We can easily think of the interest in the field or aptitude, but work-like balance or working environment is also important elements for enjoying the job.
In conclusion, I want every student to remind those things seriously when considering their job and satisfy at their job.
>> In conclusion, I want every student to remember those things seriously when considering their job and satisfy at their job.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112965 wealth ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 2241
112964 Why is English fluency significant for you? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 507
112963 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 16
112962 Homework day2 Á¤*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 0
112961 How do you relax on weekend? ¹®*À² ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 608
112960 homework Æí*ö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 1179
112959 HW ±è*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-18 1
112958 dream À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-17 1
112957 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-17 1057
112956 email2 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-17 712
112955 email1 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-17 613
112954 How do you celebrate your favorite holiday? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-17 1
112953 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-17 383
112952 Riddles about jobs. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-17 2
112951 homework ³²*¸¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-17 650
112950 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-16 0
112949 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-16 0
112948 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-16 0
112947 Are you into branded items when shopping? How necessary is it to... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-16 683
112946 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-16 458

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04