¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think it is more important to make a lot of money or to enjoy your job?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¿ì
2021-09-30 433

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When we choose the job, we consider various aspects. Even though the salary is one of the most important aspects to consider, it is much more important to choose a job I can enjoy.
Since people ordinarily keep their job for a long time, choosing a job which dose not interest them at all or distress them is a foolish choice which make one's life boring and hard. If we only focus on the salary when choosing the job, the motivation for us to work is only money, thus we might not feel enough accomplishment and the possibility to quit the job is high.

There are also several points which enable one to enjoy their job. We can easily think of the interest on the field or aptitude, but work-like balance or working environment is also important elements for enjoying the job. In conclusion, I want every student to remind those things seriously when considering their job and satisfy at their job.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Vicky!

Wow! I really agree with you. You actually have a point there. It's really best to think carefully before choosing the career path that we want to take part in the future because it will greatly affect our every aspect in life.

Thank you for sharing. It's indeed a pretty good answer.

~T. Roanne ^_^

========================================================
Corrections and Suggestions:

When we choose the job, we consider various aspects. 
>> Correct! 
Even though the salary is one of the most important aspects to consider, it is much more important to choose a job I can enjoy.
>> Correct! 
Since people ordinarily keep their job for a long time, choosing a job which dose not interest them at all or distress them is a foolish choice which make one's life boring and hard. 
>>Since people ordinarily keep their job for a long time, choosing a job which does not interest them at all or distress them is a foolish choice which makes one's life boring and hard.
If we only focus on the salary when choosing the job, the motivation for us to work is only money, thus we might not feel enough accomplishment and the possibility to quit the job is high.
>> Correct! 
There are also several points which enable one to enjoy their job.
>> Correct! 
We can easily think of the interest on the field or aptitude, but work-like balance or working environment is also important elements for enjoying the job. 
>> We can easily think of the interest in the field or aptitude, but work-like balance or working environment is also important elements for enjoying the job.
In conclusion, I want every student to remind those things seriously when considering their job and satisfy at their job.
>> In conclusion, I want every student to remember those things seriously when considering their job and satisfy at their job.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111392 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 356
111391 About Your Wardrobe ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 453
111390 What is my best experience in Boracay? ±è*¹¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111389 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 485
111388 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 392
111387 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111386 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 2
111385 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 2
111384 Homework😀 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 369
111383 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 415
111382 How do you manage a tight schedule? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 292
111381 Do you think it\'s disrespectful to argue with your elders? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111380 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 2
111379 HOMEWORK : Why do women like shopping more than men? ¹Ú*Âù ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 5
111378 Do you think the age for driving should be raised or lowered? ¼Û*¾È ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 0
111377 Sentimental value ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 324
111376 What is special about your city? Tell me 3-5 things that a... È«*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 394
111375 What do you imagine are the best countries in which to raise a... ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 355
111374 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 2
111373 If you can eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 393

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04