¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Crimes

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Á¤
2021-09-30 233

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

1. What is the worst crime in your opinion? Is it prevalent in your country?

In my opinion, Vicious crimes to the weak is worst. I mean the crimes Against eldery, women, and even innocent children and animals. For example, there was a crime that teenaged grandsons murder their old grandmother stabbing with a knife many times. Even though she had raised the grandsons without their parents, they killed her because she had scolded them. Not same cases, but these kinds of crimes against the weak are increasing and getting crueler. So nowadays I don't feel like reading news articles anymore.. ;(

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Yu Jeong! 

Thank you for answering the Composition question! :) Here's my comment for your answer :) 

Question: What is the worst crime in your opinion? Is it prevalent in your country?

Your answer: In my opinion, Vicious crimes to the weak is worst. I mean the crimes Against eldery, women, and even innocent children and animals. For example, there was a crime that teenaged grandsons murder their old grandmother stabbing with a knife many times. Even though she had raised the grandsons without their parents, they killed her because she had scolded them. Not same cases, but these kinds of crimes against the weak are increasing and getting crueler. So nowadays I don't feel like reading news articles anymore.. ;(

>> In my opinion, vicious crimes against the weak is the worst. For example, crimes against elderly, women, and even innocent children and animals. For example, there was a crime where teenage grandsons murdered their old grandmother by  stabbing her with a knife for a couple of times. Even though she was the one who raised her grandsons because the parents were not there, they still killed her simply because she scolded them. Crimes like these are increasing and getting more violent, so that's why I don't feel like reading news articles anymore. 

-------------

Thank you for sharing this with me! I agree with you that it is disheartening to hear about news like these. :( We should find a way how to stop these vicious crimes so that we can have a more hopeful society. :) 


See you later in class! 

~Miya^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113259 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 1
113258 Some people say that \"money makes the world go around.\" Do you... ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 3
113257 There are some extreme hobbies that some people enjoy. What can... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 1
113256 What motivates you to do a great job at work? ·ù*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 315
113255 what I do in morning to evening ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 224
113254 Why the farm animals are important ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-10-26 194
113253 1025(3) ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 180
113252 1025(2) ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 192
113251 1025 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 205
113250 I prefer desert ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 565
113249 Which is shorter your hair or your mom\'s hair? Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 206
113248 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 0
113247 Happy Birthday To my brother! ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 402
113246 Can you name three things that you like about your job? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 1
113245 In what ways are credit cards better than cash? Á¶*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 243
113244 Do you like travelling? Why? ¹®*À² ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 953
113243 Homework from the lesson 10252021 Á¶*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 484
113242 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 228
113241 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 199
113240 What were the two last things that made you happy? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04