¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Some people today prefer to get advice for medical problems and do not want to visit a doctor. Why i

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-09-30 450

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The first thing people do is opening the website and ask what they would like to know when they have problem since the internet invented. Google is the most preferable search engine people have used because it provide a lot of information and various opinions from many professionals. People, especially, prefer to check their medical problem through internet website because it is easy to access and fast way to solve their problems. However, it can be dangerous solution because people don't want to visit hospital due to the wrong informations from the websites. There are a lot of right and accurate informations but non professionals have wrote their personal opinions or informations based on their previous experience. In addition, most people would like to get confirmation that their symptom would be light disease. So, they spend huge time to find the solutions that they want to hear from the doctors. These movement would be result on the serious problem and harm for people's health.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there! You missed the class today! Anyway, I guess you're enjoying yourself somewhere? Have a happy long weekend! 
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
The first thing people do is opening the website and ask what they would like to know when they have problem since the internet was invented. 
>>> CORRECT
Google is the most preferable search engine people have used because it provides a lot of information and various opinions from many professionals. 
>>> CORRECT
People, especially, prefer to check their medical problem through internet websites because it is easy to access and fast way to solve their problems. 
>>> People, especially, prefer to check their medical problem through internet websites because it is easy to access and it's the fastest way to solve their problems. 
However, it can be dangerous solution because people don't want to visit hospital due to the wrong informations from the websites.
>>> However, it can be a dangerous solution because people don't want to visit the hospital due to the wrong information from the websites.
 There are a lot of right and accurate informations but non professionals have wrote their personal opinions or informations based on their previous experience. 
>>>  There are a lot of right and accurate information but non-professionals have written their personal opinions or information based on their previous experience. 
In addition, most people would like to get confirmation that their symptom would be light disease.
>>> CORRECT
 So, they spend huge time to find the solutions that they want to hear from the doctors. 
>>>  So, they spend a long time to find the solutions that they want to hear from the doctors. 
These movement would be result on the serious problem and harm for people's health.
>>> These movements would be a result on the serious problem and harmful for people's health.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113565 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 0
113564 Homework ¾È*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 733
113563 Tell me about the best vacation you\'ve ever had. ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 1026
113562 Do you like surprises? Why or why not? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 2
113561 working of another country ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 5
113560 What is the funniest and most interesting cartoon you have... ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 2
113559 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 553
113558 : The tendency of human beings to copy one another is shown in... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 450
113557 Homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 655
113556 My favorite vacation ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 311
113555 I don\'t believe ghost is real ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 654
113554 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 2
113553 Some claim that men are naturally more competitive than women.... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 755
113552 homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 650
113551 For what ultimate goal do you want to speak English? ±è*¹¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 731
113550 Can you concentrate on other things when you are listening to... ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 0
113549 Schools go back to Normal in Late Novemver À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 0
113548 How do you adapt to changes? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 1
113547 Do you think it is fine to have debts? Why or why not? ¾ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 0
113546 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-11-04 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04