¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Some people today prefer to get advice for medical problems and do not want to visit a doctor. Why i

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-09-30 272

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The first thing people do is opening the website and ask what they would like to know when they have problem since the internet invented. Google is the most preferable search engine people have used because it provide a lot of information and various opinions from many professionals. People, especially, prefer to check their medical problem through internet website because it is easy to access and fast way to solve their problems. However, it can be dangerous solution because people don't want to visit hospital due to the wrong informations from the websites. There are a lot of right and accurate informations but non professionals have wrote their personal opinions or informations based on their previous experience. In addition, most people would like to get confirmation that their symptom would be light disease. So, they spend huge time to find the solutions that they want to hear from the doctors. These movement would be result on the serious problem and harm for people's health.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there! You missed the class today! Anyway, I guess you're enjoying yourself somewhere? Have a happy long weekend! 
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
The first thing people do is opening the website and ask what they would like to know when they have problem since the internet was invented. 
>>> CORRECT
Google is the most preferable search engine people have used because it provides a lot of information and various opinions from many professionals. 
>>> CORRECT
People, especially, prefer to check their medical problem through internet websites because it is easy to access and fast way to solve their problems. 
>>> People, especially, prefer to check their medical problem through internet websites because it is easy to access and it's the fastest way to solve their problems. 
However, it can be dangerous solution because people don't want to visit hospital due to the wrong informations from the websites.
>>> However, it can be a dangerous solution because people don't want to visit the hospital due to the wrong information from the websites.
 There are a lot of right and accurate informations but non professionals have wrote their personal opinions or informations based on their previous experience. 
>>>  There are a lot of right and accurate information but non-professionals have written their personal opinions or information based on their previous experience. 
In addition, most people would like to get confirmation that their symptom would be light disease.
>>> CORRECT
 So, they spend huge time to find the solutions that they want to hear from the doctors. 
>>>  So, they spend a long time to find the solutions that they want to hear from the doctors. 
These movement would be result on the serious problem and harm for people's health.
>>> These movements would be a result on the serious problem and harmful for people's health.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
112132 Wring1 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 275
112131 Wring1 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 303
112130 Wring1 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 295
112129 What important things you should always check these days? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 281
112128 speaking-3rd ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 257
112127 speaking part2 ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-22 237
112126 Grammer review test ÀÌ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-21 303
112125 Music is vital for me ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-20 278
112124 Make a sentence using the words below: Çã*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-20 0
112123 Why is English fluency significant for you? ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2021-09-20 252
112122 Make 3 sentences each for EDIBLE and POTABLE. ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-20 1
112121 page 20 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-09-19 301
112120 about of my favorite soccer player ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-09-19 939
112119 What item do you love to shop? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-18 289
112118 What values are important to your family? ¾ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-09-18 1
112117 What is the longest friendship that you have had? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-18 1
112116 9.17 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-18 1
112115 How has inflation affected you? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 1
112114 Why English is hard??????? ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 329
112113 page 12 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-09-17 406

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04