¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿¬
2021-10-01 413

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

No, I don't think so because even poor people can be rich if they try, and rich people can be greedy and poor if they want more.
There's nothing that we can't do because we try hard.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Jenny!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


No, I don't think so because even poor people can be rich if they try, and rich people can be greedy and poor if they want more.

>> No, I don't think so because even poor people can be rich if they try, and rich people can be greedy and become poor if they want more.

There's nothing that we can't do because we try hard.

>> There's nothing that we can't do when we try harder.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
113215 what makes you happy? or stressed? ¾ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 0
113214 Most proud culture in Korea ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 945
113213 Which is longer, a snake or a worm? Àü*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 360
113212 What is the hardest problem you have ever faced in your life? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 556
113211 10.22 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 0
113210 Where do you always get information? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 0
113209 How can you stay healthy? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 0
113208 What jobs would be more promising in the future? ·ù*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-25 441
113207 Do you think you are a good team player? Why do you say so? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 401
113206 How do you enjoy your hobby with minimal spending? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 1
113205 How do brain teasers affect the brain? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 2
113204 How do you feel about customer complaints? Do you think you are... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 369
113203 Homework ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 349
113202 Strong Power of Body Language Á¤*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 419
113201 How often would you say you get a good night\'s sleep? ¹Ú*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 425
113200 Homework ¹æ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 424
113199 Writing Task: Elections aren\'t the only way to change the... ¹Ú*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 2
113198 Do you think a high English language proficiency level is needed? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 530
113197 Should the fashion industry use models that look more like... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 1079
113196 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-10-24 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04